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Zebra Print Snuggie 

a blanket/ comfortable lounge-ware, with a mock zebra pattern print has been proven to drastically improve your catching of M&M skills when another person tosses one towards your face.
"Man, I'm terrible at catching M&M's in my mouth. . . . if only I had a Zebra Print Snuggie. . . . "

Painting the Zebra 

A metaphor for male masturbation. The motion of the fingers wrapped around the penis shaft simulates the theoretical "painting" of stripes on a zebra.
Did you see the latest issue of Maxim? I was totally painting the zebra to it.