Billy: first mate reporting for duty!
Grandpa: 'tis a fine instrument you got there, Billy. All hands on the poop deck.
Billy: oh Gramps. Here it comes...
Grandpa: garrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. That's the stuff.
10 minutes later:
Billy: awwwwww - sick. Grandpa, I have a Poonis.
Grandpa: yarrrr. Gross. Time for a colostomy bag...