A thoroughly average university lost somewhere in suburbia west of Portland, Oregon.

Nobody cares about the undergraduates at Pacific because their graduate programs are so amazing, so the puny College of Arts and Sciences is plagued by hangovers, dudes too lazy to shave, ugly chicks, cannibals, and bed bugs.

Somewhat notorious for having the worst football team imaginable, and the largest HawaiianFest (also termed Luau) this side of, well, Hawaii.