A thoroughly average university lost somewhere in suburbia
west of Portland, Oregon
Nobody cares about the undergraduates at Pacific because their graduate programs are so amazing, so the puny College of Arts and Sciences is plagued by hangovers
, dudes too lazy to shave
, ugly chicks
, cannibals, and bed bugs
Somewhat notorious for having the worst football team imaginable, and the largest HawaiianFest (also termed Luau) this side of, well, Hawaii
-Hmm... where should I go to college?
-How about Pacific University? They accept anybody.