One aspect that sets apart Oakville from the rest of the surrounding GTA and Hamilton is the quality of cannabis that flows through there. Oakvillians are known for their stronger than average, aroma-rich, kind buds. Sure some are money hungry and produce commercially (boo)...but there are many skilled informal horticulturalists that produce impressive product. sadly enough many grow ops have been taken down here, a real tragedy. so big up to oakville in that respect. otherwise...oakville is boring, the florida-retirement-central of canada, and full of black kids that wanna be white, and white kids that wanna be black. the rest of the white kids are preppy pretty boys, with a minority of down-to-earth, sensible skater types. although there lies some nice female talent in oakville, their heads are hollow and their purses are worth more than my 1990 toyota camry. get me out of this jokeville town, that's really a city but they want to stay a town so they don't get any strip clubs opening up. nuff said.
Guy who owns Microsoft Canada and builds a $25 million dollar house on the lakeshore in rich east oakville's wife: HONEY, i'm allergic to the new carpets and furniture
Microsoft Canada Guy: It's okay honey, we'll just sell this and build a new house.
Rich Oakville Girl: Daddy, i don't like the colour of my mercedes anymore.
Daddy: It's okay honey, just drive my bentley until I buy you a new mercedes, fully loaded with your favourite colour tonight.
Mother: "Than take the other other Lexus."
Anyone who agrees with this article will give it a thumbs up. And anyone who gives it a thumbs down is admitting they are a very jealous person and in fact wish they lived in Oakville themselves.
Mississauga Kid 2: Ya me 2 man, they gotz lyk nic ecars and ar better thanu s.
Oakville Kid: Dudes, Learn to fucking spell, then get a job and earn some money.
1. You have drunken stories about drinking in a park
2. You think it should be called Jokeville, or Tokeville or Cokeville
3. You will hang out til 4am at any place that is open 24 hours: Subway, Coffee Time, Tim Horton's, 7-11, or if nothing's open, pretty much anywhere in Bronte
3. Almost all of your friends, at one point or another, have worked at McDonalds, Wendy's or Tim Horton's
4. You can find people you went to school with at Sharkeys every Friday, or Big Bucks every Tuesday
5. You have to pass at least six Tim Horton's just to get to school
6. You never knew Oakville had a city hall
7. You constantly get stuck behind old people going 40 km down Lakeshore
8. You've met Donovan Bailey multiple times and you think he's a dickhead
9. You think there IS a difference between people depending on
whether they're from Glen Abbey, Iroquois, South East Oakville or Bronte
10. No matter how much it sucked, every summer you'd go to the Waterfront Festival
11. You ever had your photograph in the Oakville Beaver
12. You remember seeing cheap movies at Encore Cinema off Kerr or the Playhouse on Lakeshore
13. You remember when Trafalgar Village Mall actually had stores in it
14. You remember when hanging out at Oakville Place was cool
15. You have an image for every high school: QE Park - not so bright kids; Blakelock - dirty, dirty Blakelock; Appleby - snob central; OT and Iroquois - since when do schools look like malls?; St. Mildreds – sluts who steal all the good boys; Loyola, St.Thomas - nice fucking uniforms guys!; General Wolfe - dumb asses, White Oaks - who the fuck goes there?
16. You hung out at Maple Grove plaza or Oakville Town Center when you were in grade 9
17. Some of the funnest moments of your life are running from cops after a bush party through the ravines
18. 'Downtown' meant Starbucks, White Oak for the greasy spoon goodness, Whats the Scoop for desert or the Kings Arms for beers
19. Part of your Christmas ritual involves driving by the house where they filmed "The Santa Clause" with Tim Allen
20. You've ever bought pot from a Wendy's/Tim Horton's drive thru
21. You're perplexed as to why the Blockbuster Video/Coffee Time parking lot on Trafalgar is such a gino hotspot
22. You played hockey at Maple Grove Arena
23. You tried to find the Olsen twins in the summer
24. The people who live next door to you own either a BMW, a Mercedes or a Lexus (most likely one of each)
25. You have “slutted” people from your friend’s car along the Lakeshore
26. You have been drunk in Sobeys…. more than once.
27. To you the “ghetto” means Kerr Street
28. You used to go to Midnight Madness with your parents, now you go with your friends…drunk.
29. You’ve seen someone in grade school carrying a Louis Vuitton purse
and the ..1 give away that you're from Oakville...
You've used the word 'CHATE' in a sentence
Oakville kid 2: i think i might just go to both
Oakville kid 1: you taken the benz?
Oakville kid 2: nah Im going in style....H2 stylee
Oakville kid: get a job you dirty binder and stop critisizing us because your jealous of our parent's money
Mississauga kid: yo dog you got beef, youz a hater
Oakville kid: learn how to talk or get out of my country, I'm ashamed I pay taxes to keep you in school
The town consists of:
* wanna-be-think-they-are-hard-wigger white boys.
* Abercrombie/A & F white boy and girl all american wannabes.
* House parties every weekend
The most common word is chate
student: "THATS CHATE MISS"
oakvillian: "chate chate chate chate chate"
Oakville Kid: AT LEAST I'M LITERATE! HAVE FUN LIVING IN YOUR BOX!
Me: Chill the fuck out, this is urbandictionary.com, you both sound like fucking morons.