n. An abnormally long piece of human excrement, characterized by the tail end going down into the bottom of the bowl, and the head end breaking the surface of the water. A poop is only classified as such when it is in one continuous, unbroken piece. In many cases, the person responsible for the freak-poop is astounded by how much poop came out of them.
Pooper: "Holy Crap, dude, come check this out. I just crapped a Loch Ness Monster!"
Friend: "Oh my gosh, what the hell did you eat?"
A mythical creature said to live in a lake in Scotland
. Keeps trying to get $3.50 from Chef
's parents. Once dressed up as a Girl Scout to achieve said goal.
"No, you God damn Loch Ness Monsta, I ain't givin' you no three fitty
a huge turd
Someone left a Loch Ness Monster and clogged the toilet!
An unidentified animal living in Loch Ness, the largest body of fresh water in Britain. It first came to the attention of the general public in the thirties when a London surgeon R.K.Wilson took a photo of what looked like the head-and-neck of a dinosaur-like creature. What with The Lost World and RKO's King Kong in the cinema, there was an explosion in public interest. The monster's image, however, was to be forever tainted by the pantomime which followed, in which a game big hunter called Wetherall came to Loch Ness and discovered footprints on the shore. The tracks turned out to have been made by a hippo foot, which was some kind of ashtray or other keepsake. What kind of a big game hunter couldn't work out that they were all hippo tracks made by the same foot I don't know, but he left Loch Ness. In 1994 the now-famous surgeon's photo turned out to be a fake, a model on a toy submarine made by Wetherall - revenge on the world that mocked him. Over the years there have been a number of photos and films of unidentified creatures in Loch Ness. Some have been proved as fakes (to be honest, I wasn't surprised when the surgeon's photo turned out to be a fake. I'd always thought there was something odd about it). But there is still strong film evidence and a lot of eye-witness evidence to support the existence of a long-necked animal of some kind. Modern scientists often dismiss eye-witness evidence as non-evidence. I'm glad they're not running the judicial system,...more...
An ugly woman (coined by groundskeeper Willie)
Ach! Back to the loch with YOU nessie!
A Scottish naval submarine made to look like a Dinosaur that once appeared in the Loch Ness. It only resurfaced to verify its course.
The loch ness monster isn't after your $3.50 chef, it has no arms to get it
Did I ever tell you about the time I saw the Loch Ness Monster?