Top Definition
Man who was nailed to a plank for saying how nice it would be if everyone was nice to each other. Had his message misinterpreted by millions who now think it is their job to persecute certain groups of people(christians).
Jesus:be nice to others.
by Jonjo January 15, 2005
Our savior
Who died on the cross to save us from our sins.
The one who keeps my faith alive.
I say to myself that everythings going to be okay, because of Jesus.
by peaceiseverything March 18, 2010
a kick ass superhero.
person 1 "holy shit is that jesus, how is he not sinking"
person 2 "he can walk on water dipshit"
by fourway March 16, 2010
The second coming is here! Jesus is back in the form of Joel Zimmerman aka deadmau5!! We are saved!!
Jesus is back bitches!!
by Rellik Uzi August 18, 2010
A nice guy who taught love, kindness, tolerance, etc. Sacrificed himself because we're all giant penises. Now people claim to follow his teachings, but just screw them over.
Oh look, there's Jesus over there! The world's gonna end.
by Poop N Scoop July 05, 2005
He was God in a human form. He came to earth to recieve the punishment that everybody else deserved. He did so, and anybody who recieves the sacrifice is a Christian.

Many non-Christians hate him because he asks for some submission in return.
Guy:Do you know Jesus?
Guy2:I know of Jesus
Guy:What do you think of Jesus?
Guy2:He was an idiot
Guy:Why?
Guy2:Because he asks for obedience, just because he died on some tree.
by Noogahoogah October 03, 2009
the original zombie
dude jesus died on a cross and came back 3 days later
by jren15 April 10, 2012
The king of kings and the Lord of Lords!! A man that will accept you for who you are and save your soul and he will never judge you just love you!!!
I praise you Jesus the rock of ages!
by Kittyolee1 September 08, 2013

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