Jareds tend to be very tall, and very attractive. They have a hipster style, mixed with a little bit of rock. Jareds usually are very intelligent, and can be very overprotective in a serious situation. He knows how to treat a girl, and can always tell how girls feel just by hearing their voices. If you ever start dating a Jared, never let him go.
Girl 1: Did you see what Jared is wearing today?

Girl2 2: omg, yes! He's so adorable! I just want to take off his beanie and ruffle his hair!

Girl 1: I know right!

Girl 2: If he ever asks me out its a definite yes!
by nickiminajared December 28, 2012
Jared Fogel, of Subway diet fame, lost 245 lbs in one year eating Subway fare. Lots of rumors about AIDS, coke, bypass surgery, but he apparently did it honestly.
Fat Bastard, to Austin Powers: "I went on the Subway diet, like Jared and lost 180 pounds. Unfortunately, now my neck looks like a vagina."
by Dr. Dutch Evil March 21, 2006
A guy who is usually extremly ugly sucks major dick at soccer and eats butthole for breakfast.
Dude why is that kid being such a jared i dont know look at the white stuff on his face.
by Stuhna September 27, 2010
a total stud from Cali.
my boyfriend, my favorite, my love.
loves the Lord, loves his friends, loves his family.
will someday be an amazing husband and dad.
needs to come eat a mango with me, enjoys breakfast food, hates cherry flavored items. he's a eagle scout.
and he's mine.
everyone loves Jared who wouldn't? i sure do.

that guy is such a Jared wow, i want him.
by Kelcy February 06, 2008
A man or woman (no one really knows) whose hair smells of shit. He/She is very short and tends to have a high pitched voice. Jared sucks at sports so he/she resorts to drama. Jared sits at home all day and reads because he/she has no life.
Guy: Did you see that jared over there?
Other Guy: Yeah what a faggot. I hate him!
by WienerMaster3000 August 15, 2010
the act of messing with or fucking up someone's Myspace/Facebook/etc. profile without their permission. You can jared someone's profile by adding lame interests, changing their default picture to David Hasselhoff, or changing their 'about me' section to reflect a homosexual lifestyle.
Example of jared :

"I'm sick of getting my profile jared-ed every time I forget to sign out!"

"I spent four hours last night jared-ing her profile."
by Larongitis December 07, 2008
To completely kill everyone in the room's buzz by being totally negative and against everyone else.
Wow, that Jared completely ruined the party.

No, I couldn't have fun last night, i was with a Jared

Bald Headed FUCK!
by buttsexman1234 February 04, 2010
One who humps legs until the point of ejaculation
"My boyfriend pulled a Jared last night; needless to say he got my sheets all wet and I still got nothing out of it."
by Gerch December 04, 2007

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