me: "no thank you. if i want a burger and fries i'll have them covered in lard and salt like the Lord intended."
in n out lover: "but that is so unhealthy! i am also atheist because it is trendy so i can't accept your statement."
me: "if you really want to be healthy then why don't you eat some salad instead of eating 5 slabs of meat and 10 slabs of cheese laughably called a quinceyquincey or a 5x5 or whatever cutsie name you can think of and fries and a milkshake?"
in n out lover: "omg...oh wait i'm atheist now...or was i agnostic...well whatever, you are so ignorant you unhealthy mcdonalds eating bastard! didn't you see that movie or read that book? fast food is bad for you! i love michael moore too! he is soooo smart and aware like me!"
me: ::takes amazingly heavenly orgasmic bite of a quarter pounder from mcdonalds:: "i rest my case..."
Outside an In-N-Out (near San Rafael, CA)
In-N-Out Fries Holder (empty, dur)
Heart attack on a bun, a delicious one at that.
"Animal Style" - bun is grilled with mustard, sauteed onions instead of raw, pickles, extra "special sauce" - this can also be applied to fries
"Wish Burger" - no meat, i.e. veggie burger
"Protein Style" - lettuce wrapped around the burger instead of a bun
"Flying Dutchman" - two meat patties with two slices of cheese. that's it.
"Double Meat" = like a Double Double without cheese.
"3 by Meat" = three meat patties and no cheese.
"4x4" - 4 meat patties with 4 slices of cheese. Are you SURE you can eat that?
"2x4" - 2 meat patties with 4 slices of cheese for the fromage afficionado
"Grilled Cheese" - cheeseburger, sans meat
"Fries - well done/light" - get your fries extra crispy and brown the way you like them or mushy!
"Neopolitan Shake" - a blend of chocolate, vanilla and strawberry shakes
*Note: You can get a burger with as many meat paties or cheese slices as you want. Just tell the In-N-Out Burger cashier how many meat paties and how much cheese you want and that is what you'll get! For instance, if you want 10 pieces of meat and 20 pieces of cheese tell them you want a "10-by-20. They'll make it"
me: "Hi, can I have the double-double animal style, no onions."
dude: "would you like the combo?"
me: "yea sure, and can you put cheese on the fries and also i'd like the swirl shake instead of the soda"
me: "oh you, gimme some of that fuckin special sauce and some salt packets on the side."