'Giving someone a Hauser' is defined as servicing someone whilst on the toilet.
She wanted some loving, but I had to poop, so I gave her a Hauser.
by Grayson W August 8, 2005
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The smallest fucking town in Idaho. Located in northern Idaho about one mile from the Washington boarder, near Spokane Washington. All thats really there is a gas station, a bar, a trailer park, and a somewhat nice somewhat disgusting lake. There is about 1000 residents.

Hauser is a good place to go to get away from the city or relitives.
Matt: Goddamn me mother-in-law is fucking anoying! I'm going to Hauser for the weekend. Later
by Dewit June 6, 2009
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To make a statement or take an action which defeats itself and/or clowns the initiator. To ridicule oneself unintentionally or disembowel one's entire stance in debate.

A message board synonym for Munsoned with origins in the flaming and trolling community and prior, to the legend of Kaspar Hauser in 19th century German history noted for contradicting himself and fabricating odd stories.
"Latent male homosexuality is disgusting to me. What are you wearing, John? Take it all off, you big fag. Dance for me in webcam."

"Hahaha...too funny. That homophobe just hausered himself."
by Duerf December 28, 2010
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Hauser: (slang, Verb) (Bohemia/Western Czech Republic and Northern/Central California coast)

1) To hauser is to completely clean someone or something out, or to steal or take absolutely everything during a robbery or petty theft.

2) To leave nothing behind
1) I pulled off the biggest hauser of the year on the Cal State Sacramento biology department; I took every free school supply they had.

2) Phil hausered our fridge last night, there's nothing good left!

3) Why do you keep hausering all my fucking pills yo?
by Sean Sicklik August 29, 2007
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Nown: a person who "consistently" ditches his boys for a girl, and probably doesn't get laid. Also a person who goes to the bar let's his buddy break the ice and "attempts" to steal your bitch.
Dude why the fuck you we're you hausering last night I was trying to get laid.
by SwolePatrol82 February 24, 2018
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1.To make a fool of oneself. 2.To say one thing and do another. 3. To scream meltdown when cornered 4. To make air claims 5. To contradict oneself 6. Definitions 1-5 performed simultaneously.
Kaspar hausered himself but was too pig ignorant to notice everyone was laughing at him, instead of with him.
by Modern Words December 28, 2010
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The quirkiest girl you know. Could be gay. A different breed of human.
was she wearing weird shoes? Oh that’s so Charlotte Hauser
by hehehehehheheh July 30, 2019
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