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1.
A Dead town which sucks the life out of it's inhabitants and anyone within a 500-mile radius.

Over the years, Falkirk has been dominated by fat bisexual tramps who proclaim themselves as 'emos'. These creatures have invaded the town's bandstand although are easily repelled by a shiny adidas logo or two.
After several one-night stands with equally bedgraggled towns such as Cumbernauld and Livingstone, Falkirk has even given birth to 10 Children referred to as 'Bonnybridge', 'Grangemouth', 'Camelon', 'Larbert', 'Stenhousemuir', 'The Braes', 'Bainsford', 'The Bogue' and 'Bo'ness'. But we don't talk about Bo'ness. They eat their children there.
The town's last scummy residents, are the pensioners. They may be found standing in ASDA on a snowy day, staring at the empty shelves and then harassing passers by. If you see a Falkirk Pensioner, Bag It, Bin it, and then pour petrol in the bin and set it alight.
Falkirk is Shite. End of.
Jim: Lets go to Falkirk!
Bob: *Kills Self*
by Howe. December 06, 2010
 
2.
A fantastic town in Central Scotland and home of the mighty Falkirk Football Club.
Falkirk is wonderful
by Anonymous May 13, 2003
 
3.
The centre of the universe. God's second home. Home also of the greatest football team ever
Is this Heaven? Naw mate, even better it's Falkirk
by craigy1876 December 08, 2007
 
4.
Falkirk is small boring scottish town that is full of neds
A day in Falkirk is a day wasted
by Geggs August 15, 2004
 
5.
Falkirk is a chav farm bomb in now.
Falkirk is wonderful, aye a wonderful bucket of shite
by Geggs January 23, 2005
 
6.
Also home to Falkirk Young Offenders Prison where the scummy schemiegadgiedregs of scotlands youth who should be drowned at birth learn their trade i.e
how to steal cars chibspitting and shoplifting when they are not getting it up the ass.
I'd rather die than spend 1 hour in falkirk.

Falkirk = Shit
by Geggs September 18, 2004
 
7.
falkirk is town in central scotland home to the scum of the earth. where many homeless people can be found.
my bin is empty.ok i'll throw my rubbish in falkirk.
by SeanX May 14, 2003