one reason the unemployment rate is going up
Husband: how much money did u spend this year on the gifts for Christmas honey?
Wife: idk, probably about $10,000.
Husband: stupid bitch! We're already in debt $5,000!!
(The family files for unemployment 2 weeks later)
Dude, it's like Christmas in July!
During Christmas, we get presents.
When you want to end a conversation, change the subject, or don't want to answer the question. Usually said in almost a whisper and it kinda has a ring to it
Bill: Hey, so hows it going
Tammy: So who you taking to the dance
Kevin: Do you want to try my moms pie
Kevin: So no
Ryan: how about those Giants
The punchline at the end of a year long joke
The planet has been blown up to make room for an interstellar bypass...must be Christmas, never could get the hang of Christmas
The release date of Alien vs Predator Requiem (AVP-R)
Person 1: What are you doing on Christmas?
Person 2: Oh, you know, spending some time with the family. You?
Person 1: Fuck that, I'm going to see AVP-R.
The best freakin' holiday ever! Except it's starting to cross the line from really awesome, to annoying, because it's starting before thanksgiving, more than a month before christmas.
Jeff: Man, Christmas rules!
Ian: Hell yeah it does!
Jesus: Damn you advertisers for stealing my birthday! DAAAAAAAMN YOOOOUU!