Christian holiday moved to conflict with the time of year when everyone everywhere (and everywhen) celebrates the winter solstice (point of Earth's orbit where, in the northern temperate zones, the sun's zenith slows its southern decent and begins moving north again = another year to live).

2. Hodgepodge of ancient and not-so-ancient rituals, including sacrificing a tree to Mother Nature, celebrating the miracle that got Nicholas his sainthood (reassembling murdered and hacked up child parts in a barrel back into children), and, oh, the birth of Jesus, a jew, and the guy that made 12 of his buddies drink his blood and eat his flesh, before he got executed and came back from the dead. (Can you say "zombie"?)

3. Day that Santa brings new socks and undies. If your bad, you get coal (to keep from freezing) and an orange (for vitamin C to prevent scurvy).
Fucking Christmas. I wanna get drunk.
by danw December 22, 2003
A time of year when people spend more money than they have on crap for people who don't deserve it.
I just wasted 500 dollars on Christmas crap.
by Frogbutt November 30, 2004
The worst holiday of the year, which is, ironically, in the second best season of the year.
Winter might be my favorite season if it weren't for all the "Christmas-time" crap going on.
by FNW September 28, 2011
The worst enemy for your parents---or if you're a parent, YOUR---credit card(s).
PARENT: *faints*
by Delf January 05, 2004
The only holiday where you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks.
Merry 4 month early Christmas
by Jordan<3 August 14, 2006
A day that somehow went from the birth of christ to a day where a fat man in a red suit goes down your chimmney and leaves things under a tree that you have for some reason placed in your house. If you are good you get a gift, and if your 'naughty' you get a lump of coal, which really is a fire hazard come to think of it. Also a day where children throw tantrums because they did not recieve the pony they just HAD to have.
Little Becky didn't get her pony from the fat man in the red suit on christmas, so she vowed to make sure there was a big fire in the fireplace next year.
by LeDuh October 31, 2006
A holiday that was originally meant to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ ,even though nobody really knows when he was born. Fortunately for kids, nobody really gives a shit about that part. In modern days, its all about adults bitching about much money they have to spend on their kids only to have the ungrateful little bastards bitch and moan about how they didn't get everything they wanted. Also a day that somehow went from celebrating the birth of Christ to a day celebrating a fat guy in a red suit that breaks into peoples houses and leaves presents under a tree that for some reason is indoors decorated with all kinds of cheap crap. Talk about selling out. Jesus would not be happy :(
Christmas is by far the greatest marketing scheme of all time. The commercials usually start mid November, completely ignoring Thanksgiving, and thanks to all the propoganda, it insures that all the stores can raise their prices only to say that it's a super limited Christmas "bargain." All in all, Christmas is a great holiday, so fuck it, Merry Friggin Christmas to all and to all a good night. Just remember that National Hangover Day is right around the corner
by Xero _ Manifest December 25, 2010
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