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Don't touch my shit 

A term said to someone if they steal your stuff, an angry response to someone taking your stuff in an annoying way. Usually between your peers or friends.
Guy 1 takes Guy 2's backpack.
Guy 1: "Bro, gimme my shit back. And don't touch my shit."

don't touch what you can't afford 

What was once the ultimate put down. The strongest diss you could say to somebody who was annoying you by being physical with something you own.

Starting off with expensive things that other poor kids couldn't afford, this was a snobbish insult used by richer kids who had the flashest new gear and one of the poorer kids wanted to touch it as they could never afford somethign so extravagent. This was in fear of the poorer kids leaving germs or nits on the item leaving the richer kid fucked later on. This would put them in their place and the poor kids would know their place in society.

However, things started to get a bit out of hand circa 1997. The diss spread wildly across Britain's schools and soonn became used in day to day conversations heard in the playground; the cheaper the tackier the item the better the insult. It was a witty way of saaying "you're so poor that..." but without having to use the brainpower to think of an item and and it would leave people hurt inside.

Soon enough people found a way of responding to this comment which was to get your wallet out and show you have enough money to indeed afford the item, thus making the person who used it look silly and make their point completely void. Soon after this was discovered people stopped using it, and thus sending a classic diss to the history books along with "your mum gives head for bread" and other such insults.
Person 1 "Hey, Let me have a look at that pen."
Person 2 "Oi, don't touch what you can't afford!"
Person 1 "Damn...you didn't have to go there."

Don't touch my balls 

Joe: You have a bug in your code. Let me sit down, and I'll fix it.
John: Don't touch my balls.

Joe: Would it be touching your balls if I called your girlfriend tonight?
John: No, that would be fine.

don't touch my junk 

When one passes through airport security - phrase to agent not to touch certain body parts!
When passing through airline security gate, before body scan: Don't touch my junk or I'll sue you.
don't touch my junk by GranbyGirl November 19, 2010

Don't touch my junk! 

Infamous, now viral, phrase uttered by John Tyner of Oceanside after refusing to be subjected to an airport body scanner and subsequent thorough pat down.

Can also be used in any social setting where you just want people to stop bothering you with uninteresting things.
TSA - "Sir, we need to pat you down..."
JT - "Don't touch my junk!"

Boring friend- "Hey man, you want to see these slides from my family summer vacation?"

JT - Don't touch my junk!"
Don't touch my junk! by alexgb72 November 19, 2010

don't touch it 

The flabby fold of fat on the nape of someone's neck, best observed in fat bald sweaty old paps when they tilt their head slightly to look upwards. The phrase "Don't touch it!" derives from the likelihood of an angry response you may get if you feel tempted to give the enticing fold of cervical flab a curious poke. Can in some instances be referred to as double or triple touch to refer to two or three folds of neckfat respectively.
1. The guy buying salmon in front of me at the supermarket had some seriously sexy don't touch it going on.
2. I had a serious temptation to go over and rub chicken grease into the fat triple touch of the wheelchair bound window maker, so I did. Turned out it was gout.
3. "DON'T FUCKIN TOUCH IT BITCH!"