cynical

A seemingly appealing and useful way of thinking, the positive aspects of cynicism only overshadow the truth that cynics rarely get anything out of life with they way they think (despite believing quite the opposite). Normally accepting humanity as inherently evil, they define good and bad under broad, usually universal terms that immediately apply to everybody, no matter how generous, saintly, or selfless they are. Aestheticism, to a cynic, is not only a childish following, but one which all humans subconsciously live by. Assuming this, they are among a superior group of intellectuals who have "outfoxed" their fellow man. While it is a mark of maturity to be wary of certain people and situations, to think of the entire world as double-crossing greed mongering sinners whose every good deed has an ulterior motive is usually an adolescent stage of thinking that tends to get replaced as the person sees more of their world.

Cynical Man: "Wow, the most beautiful woman in the world! You're perfect in every way and are willing to grant me your heart. Too bad you're going to probably stab me in the back somewhere down the line."

Most Beautiful Woman in the World: "Well alright then, I'll just ask that oh so naive optimist if he'd like to get laid tonight instead."

Cynical Man: "I don't need happiness or pleasure for my remaining 60 years on this planet! All I need is this hole in the ground. It's where we all end up anyway."

cynical by J. Literal January 5, 2009

Cynical

1. An adjective describing a person with sarcastic, witty, quirky, pessimistic who rejects all conventions, whether of religion, manners, housing, dress, or decency, advocating the pursuit of virtue in a simple and unmaterialistic lifestyle.

2. An individual in Urban Dictionary who likes to stir the turd and add sarcastic, funny, and/or assholey defenitions.

You are so cynical, you make me throw up large, giant, man eating larvae.

Cynical by The Amazing Asshole January 26, 2009

cynical

The adjective for an individual who attributes all actions to selfish motives. Becoming cynical comes from someone just not giving a damn about the rest of the human race and is recommended for all Americans.

Person : "So yeah, this emo kid posted this myspace bullitin where he said he would kill himself."
Cynic: "That's great, hope he actually did it."
Person: "WTF? You cynical jerk! You should be ashamed for saying things like that!"
Cynic: "At least, I can stand on my own two feet..."

cynical by Darkest_Elite May 28, 2006

cynical

The only way to be.

Look at how fuckin shitty everyone and everything is.

HOW could anyone NOT be cynical?

The whole world is homosexual.

cynical by To hell with this queer ass planet. March 12, 2005

Cynical

The required outlook in order to find the cold hard facts to a problem.

Person 1: Dude that idea is great! I think it is flawless.

Cynical person: No, too many potential flaws there. Try again.

Person 1: Dude, quit being so damn cynical

Cynical by LeCynic June 18, 2013

Cynical

The most misused word on the internet.

To be cynical is to tend to view people as by their own self-interest.

Not to be confused with pessimism, which is a tendency to believe that a bad outcome is more likely than a good one.
Also, not to be confused with skepticism, which is when you would doubt the truth of something and demand evidence.

Person 1: I'm cynical about the future.
Person 2: You mean pessimistic, right?
Person 1: Pessimistic! Yes, sorry, that's what I meant.

Cynical by Red Jacket July 17, 2021

cynical

In modern culture, cynicism can be commonly seen throughout society.
Traits of Cynicism include:
-publicly displaying your ideas on philosophy
-complaining about the world.
-seeming dark and giving off a hopeless mood.
-losing hope in the world.

Note: For those young people that are cynical, don't worry. You are nowhere near where you can spout out ideas on life and how shitty the world is. You'll get the idea soon enough, and you will learn to appreciate the world for what it is, and try to live with the glass half-full.
You might still think that the world may be hopeless, and that may be true, but living with this as your way of life is unhealthy. So, get out and enjoy life while it lasts. You don't want to grow old and think back saying "Well look at that." So stop being so fucking pathetic, and with the "i've been there, done that" image. It's really uncool, if you get it.

Cynical youth: Tsk. Tsk. You really don't know anything about the world at all do you? Sigh- you hopeless shit. Well let me enlighten you...

Slightly more Matured Youth: Will you shut the fuck up? I'm trying to finish my essay so i can go watch a movie or read a book or something.

cynical by bingbongdicks December 19, 2008