Alternative NNN Calendar

Jack-off January
Fuck-time February
Masturbating March
Anal April
Moaning May
Jizzing June
Juicy July
Ate-out August
Sucking September
Ovulating October
Nutting November
Dick-riding December
I am participating in Ate-out August instead of No Nut November this year.

Yo bro, you trying the Alternative NNN Calendar this year?
Of course bro, i am always up for a challenge.
by Delays April 15, 2024
mugGet the Alternative NNN Calendarmug.

bobistic calendar

In the bobistic calendar, you don't have any past or future. Yesterday? What's that? Tomorrow? What's that? What I ate this morning? What's a morning? You just have the present. And the present is in the year 202030. When was Jesus born? Jesus is born at 202030. When are the next elections? In 202030. What was the previous year? It was 202030. Next Year? Thats also 202030. Yesterday, tomorrow, next week? None of them exists. Only 202030.
The bobistic calendar tells me that we are in 202030.
by fermentedcola December 26, 2024
mugGet the bobistic calendarmug.
Initially created to avoid having to say the term "groomer" (or relative terms such as "grooming") aloud when in the company of people, or in a place where you'd rather not have people hear you talking of such a topic. Especially when it comes to discussing the topic to someone who is easily triggered by the initial subject.
"Door-to-Door Calendar Salesman" is a code-term to use in place of a "child groomer."

"Selling calendars" means to commit the act of grooming.
"Going door to door" means they're searching for minors to groom.
"Asking a minor for calendars or photos of their calendars" means they're asking a minor for illegal sexual favours, or for sexually explicit photos of said minor.

Person A: "Have you heard that Onision has been going door to door and selling calendars?"
Person B: "What the fuck is up with that? Selling calendars...He should go to prison for it."
by horsehorsehorse December 25, 2021
mugGet the Door-to-Door Calendar Salesmanmug.

Gluomday Calendar

In connection to the 8th day Gluomday, the Gluomday calendar Is the only official calendar to recognise the existence of Gluomday, the calendar is separate to the Gregorian Calendar, as it is currently in its first year due to the recent discovery of Gluomday on February 7, 2023, February 7, 2023 is considered January 1, 1 in the Gluomday Calendar.
Ashfaq: I do not support Gluomday, and think it is a false word
Roberts: You will bow to the Gluomday Calendar!
by gluomdayisreal February 10, 2023
mugGet the Gluomday Calendarmug.

Toothless Calendar

Toothless Calendar- a toothless calendar is a calendar that tracks something of zero value over a long period of time, usually marking each week and the weekly marking is usually written “xxx Week’s” with incorrect use of the apostrophe.

For example, my wife has been tracking how many weeks my neighbor has yet to pick up the aluminum tin blowing around their yard. Her calendar is marked every week as “ 12 Week’s Tin in yard”

The Toothless Calendar started not as the meaning is “without teeth” but rather as the first calendar tracked cars that were parked from a guy named “Toothless Tom”
My Toothless Calendar has the neighbors at 12 weeks and the aluminum tin is still not picked up yet.
by Doing it all the time March 19, 2024
mugGet the Toothless Calendarmug.

Calendar Lockout

When you forget to buy a calendar in the beginning of the year, you realize it months later, and you are too poor, dumb or lazy to buy a new one.
Oh shit it's may, and I didn't buy a calendar, no way Im spending that money now. This is bullshit.

I guess you had a calendar lockout this year
by Swagglord August 11, 2012
mugGet the Calendar Lockoutmug.

Alternative NNN Calendar

Jack-off January
Fuck-time February
Masturbating March
Anal April
Moaning May
Jizzing June
Juicy July
Ate-out August
Sucking September
Ovulating October
Nutting November
Dick-riding December
I am participating in Ate-out August instead of No Nut November this year.

Yo bro, you trying the Alternative NNN Calendar this year?
Yeah of course bro.
by Delays April 15, 2024
mugGet the Alternative NNN Calendarmug.