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bobistic calendar

In the bobistic calendar, you don't have any past or future. Yesterday? What's that? Tomorrow? What's that? What I ate this morning? What's a morning? You just have the present. And the present is in the year 202030. When was Jesus born? Jesus is born at 202030. When are the next elections? In 202030. What was the previous year? It was 202030. Next Year? Thats also 202030. Yesterday, tomorrow, next week? None of them exists. Only 202030.
The bobistic calendar tells me that we are in 202030.
by fermentedcola December 26, 2024
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Door-to-Door Calendar Salesman

Initially created to avoid having to say the term "groomer" (or relative terms such as "grooming") aloud when in the company of people, or in a place where you'd rather not have people hear you talking of such a topic. Especially when it comes to discussing the topic to someone who is easily triggered by the initial subject.
"Door-to-Door Calendar Salesman" is a code-term to use in place of a "child groomer."

"Selling calendars" means to commit the act of grooming.
"Going door to door" means they're searching for minors to groom.
"Asking a minor for calendars or photos of their calendars" means they're asking a minor for illegal sexual favours, or for sexually explicit photos of said minor.

Person A: "Have you heard that Onision has been going door to door and selling calendars?"
Person B: "What the fuck is up with that? Selling calendars...He should go to prison for it."
by horsehorsehorse December 25, 2021
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Gluomday Calendar

In connection to the 8th day Gluomday, the Gluomday calendar Is the only official calendar to recognise the existence of Gluomday, the calendar is separate to the Gregorian Calendar, as it is currently in its first year due to the recent discovery of Gluomday on February 7, 2023, February 7, 2023 is considered January 1, 1 in the Gluomday Calendar.
Ashfaq: I do not support Gluomday, and think it is a false word
Roberts: You will bow to the Gluomday Calendar!
by gluomdayisreal February 10, 2023
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Alaskan Advent Calendar

The act of jizzing in one hole of an advent calendar every day until there are no more left. Then you freeze it overnight and then eat the chocolates. When you have all of chocolates in your mouth, you have oral sex with your bitch and then shoot her with a massive load of cum, and when she is knocked out from the cum, you throwing her out the window onto a freeway.
I gave my bitch and Alaskan Advent Calendar and the funeral is next thursday.
by 6117 March 11, 2025
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Lonestar Region Calendar Clearance

Rina Pressly talks for 1 hour straight and as a whole we don't do shit.
The Lonestar Region Calendar Clearance was absolutely fucking awful. You've gotta be shitting my dick.
by kbeast123 January 31, 2023
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Alternative NNN Calendar

Jack-off January
Fuck-time February
Masturbating March
Anal April
Moaning May
Jizzing June
Juicy July
Ate-out August
Sucking September
Ovulating October
Nutting November
Dick-riding December
I am participating in Ate-out August instead of No Nut November this year.

Yo bro, you trying the Alternative NNN Calendar this year?
Yeah of course bro.
by Delays April 15, 2024
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