Wheatley 

(Spoiler warning)

A wonderful little blue-eyed ball of anxiety and awkwardness who's not a moron and really needs a hug. Voiced by the awesome Stephen Merchant as a main character in Portal 2 who helps Chell through the abandoned Aperture Science until he's exposed to the robot equivalent of crack cocaine (canonically confirmed by the devs!) and gets way ahead of himself.

He's also currently in space, and probably really needs saving. Save Wheatley :(

Person 1: Hey, who's your favorite character in Portal 2?

Person with a functioning heart: Wheatley, duh!

Wheatley by Some Friendly Gay Loser March 20, 2021

Wheatley 

Note: It's only fair to point out this article may contain spoilers.

Character from the video game Portal 2. Helps you through the first part of the game to the point where you remove Glados from power. At that point he betrays you and sends you to the abandoned part of Apeture Science, forcing you to form a partnership with Glados to stop him.

Wheatley nearly kills Chell and Glados so many times it's not even funny.

Wheatley by Gaaraofthedamned July 30, 2011

wheatley 

NOT a bad school..but simply a country club. where kids get away with everything and do what they want, when they want. no one wears the same outfit EVER. almost everyone's car is a bmw/lexus/mercedes/audi. everyone is a JAP

cutting a class when you had a quiz.. the teacher finds you later on that day, you don't get in trouble and you can make up the quiz.

wheatley by whateveryouwannacallme April 29, 2005

wheatley 

when the person your talking to is extremely moronic

Person 1: Hey isnt 1+1 = 11?
Person 2: No it isn't you fucking wheatley its 2

wheatley by WhatTheFuckDidYouExpect April 1, 2023

wheatley 

A horrible school with suburban pressures.

Wheatley is a bad school.

wheatley by Dude December 28, 2004

Wheatley 

(adverb) - an extremely frail or weak person who possess no courage, often so shockingly pathetic in their feeble and sickly characteristics, that they illicit no sympathy from onlookers.

1. "That man is so Wheatley he can't even use public toilets."

2. "He is too Wheatley to fight his own battles."

Wheatley by Monkey Tetley September 24, 2022

Wheatley 

A robot ball from Portal 2 that people really want to fuck for some reason

“gog damn i want to stick my dick in wheatley so bad”
“hes literally just a ball calm down”

Wheatley by outer spec February 29, 2024