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Jeremy Beadle 

1) A TV host that annoyed the public with various "comedy" set ups and who also made a small fortune from showing clips of people falling over and hurting themselves. He has a small hand - a deformation from God to remind us all that we shouldn't profit from others misfortune.

2) When you have been dealt a Jeremy Beadle in a card game you have been dealt a bad hand. See above.
A traumatised wannabe terrorist has been told to prove his faith by shooting his grandmother in the face and is now standing over the body with a smoking gun in his hand...

Jeremy Beadle jumps out from a bin, dressed as a terrorist:
"Ha ha..Got you..it was a fake gun there Tommy, it was a set up"
Tommy: "Shit, I used my own gun. I killed my grandmother for nothing..."
Jeremy Beadle: "My hand hurts.."
Jeremy Beadle by Digitalnonsense November 12, 2006
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jeremy beadle 

Jowly Star of Just for Laughs and Beadle's About. Also known as a "star" attraction at various circuses, possibly holding the chimps while Mary Chipperfield gives them a slap.
Interestingly, Jeremy was bitten by a rabid pig as a child and now one of his hands is turning into a trotter and he sometimes grunts like a rutting pig.
jeremy beadle by Ian Rogers March 26, 2004

Eternity leave 

When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.
Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!

With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.
Eternity leave by LingDanc803 February 7, 2023
Word of the Day on July 23, 2026
The hypothetical man (often a sinister character who decided not to go to boot camp) that is doing your girlfriend/wife while you are on deployment overseas.
Ain't no use in goin home,
Jody's got your girl and gone.
Ain't no use in goin back,
Jody's got your Cadillac,
Ain't no use in feeling blue,
Jody's took your checkbook too.
jody by Sgt Apan March 31, 2006
Word of the Day on July 22, 2026

girl grip 

The ability girls and women have developed to hold several items at once in one hand. The skill has been developed due to the lack of pockets in women's clothing.
I thought she'd need multiple trips to carry her phone, keys, wallet, and Starbucks to her car since she needed the other hand to open the door, but she used her impressive girl grip to carry everything in one hand.
girl grip by SillyMilly33 July 31, 2023
Word of the Day on July 21, 2026

Condiment home

A term that refers to one persons household hold nothing but ingredients and condiments in the kitchen area
Person A: Hey dude you got some snacks?
Person B: Nah, i live in a fucking condiment home...
Word of the Day on July 20, 2026

bang a you-ee 

of Massachusetts orig. "to make a u-turn"
hey, we missed the bar, bang a you-ee
Word of the Day on July 19, 2026