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spunkjacked

From the verb "Spunkjack", meaning to take semen from a man against his will. Typically this will be done by a pre/early-thirties woman to her soon to be ex in order to secure a set of fertilised eggs for later implantation, although it could also have uses in framing someone for crimes with a sexual angle.

The origins of the term come from a discussion surrounding a recent case in ireland in which a man blocked his ex-wife's attempts to have eggs which he had fertilized implanted in order to bear children. His arguement was that half the genetic material was his. However, unless said material was taken by force, he must have willingly donated it, there by creating a 'gift' of his sperm. So it had to be true - he'd been spunkjacked, and finally he would have spunk justice.

Interestingly there is no antonym since you can't put it back in once it's out. To date, I am unaware of any cases in which anyone has tried to force one mans semen into anothers Japs eye but if it happens to you then please accept my sincere condolences.

Contrary to popular belief, Spunkjacking is not a victimless crime. At least 2 million of the little white soldiers stand to die in a failed hit. And most men do not appreciate getting a hand job if you don't wake them up when it's happening.

Luckily, you can help cut down on Spunkjacking in your area. When a woman gives you a mouth-based treat, make sure you donkey punch her so she is forced to swallow. Also, having a spare condom or even an empty crisp packet handy can be a life saver.
So she's all like, sucking my cock but I never checked that that bitch had swallowed, next thing I know I have a paternity suit on my hands. She's a god damned Spunkjacker!

But officer, I've never even seen this woman before. How could my semen be all over her face, hands and clothing? Dear God! I've been Spunkjacked!
spunkjacked by Nunberry September 6, 2008
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spunkjockey 

a man who rides another mans cock for the purpose of pleasure and being filled with spunk
hey spunkjockey come and ride my cock...i'm gonna fill you with spunk !
spunkjockey by mike kershaw July 27, 2006
Related Words

Spunkjack 

Verb, meaning to take semen from a man against his will. Typically this will be done by a pre/early-thirties woman to her soon to be ex in order to secure a set of fertilised eggs for later implantation, although it could also have uses in framing someone for crimes with a sexual angle.

The origins of the term come from a discussion surrounding a recent case in ireland in which a man blocked his ex-wife's attempts to have eggs which he had fertilized implanted in order to bear children. His arguement was that half the genetic material was his. However, unless said material was taken by force, he must have willingly donated it, there by creating a 'gift' of his sperm. So for his case to hold water, only one thing could have happened - he'd been spunkjacked. (Had he won the case, he could have said to have had spunk justice)

Interestingly there is no antonym since you can't put it back in once it's out. To date, I am unaware of any cases in which anyone has tried to force one mans semen into anothers Japs eye but if it happens to you then please accept my sincere condolences.

Contrary to popular belief, Spunkjacking is not a victimless crime. At least 2 million of the little white soldiers stand to die in a failed hit. And most men do not appreciate getting a hand job if you don't wake them up when it's happening.

Luckily, you can help cut down on Spunkjacking in your area. When a woman gives you a mouth-based treat, make sure you donkey punch her so she is forced to swallow. Also, having a spare condom or even an empty crisp packet handy can be a life saver.
So she's all like, sucking my cock but I never checked that that bitch had swallowed, next thing I know I have a paternity suit on my hands. She's a god damned Spunkjacker!

But officer, I've never even seen this dead woman before. How could my semen be all over her face, hands and clothing? Dear God! I've been Spunkjacked!
Spunkjack by Nunberry July 16, 2006
It is said of the situation where a person has the bad luck to make contact with his testicles against an undefined surface or object, intentioned or not.
Given the nature of the word, it is more appropriate to design cases where the interaction is made with a moving object, for example, a ball.
Although it is extremely painful for the victim, it tends to be considerably funny to people who witness it.
Today in the baseball game the pitcher took a nutshot; the baseball hit him in the nuts.

Man, I just watched the funniest nutshot video ever.
Nutshot by Uberflaven March 1, 2009
Word of the Day on June 26, 2026

Nerd neck 

A "human" that spends so much time playing video games that their posture is level nerd neck. Everytime anyone goes tryhard they hunch down and their neck gets longer there fore a nerd neck is always hunched down cause they're always going try hard. In other words a nerd neck is a try hard, since their neck is 100% longer than the average human being due to playing too many video games and taking them serious, nerd necks are not even considered human anymore but something more sad. Nerd necks are often found on fortnite, their natural habitat usually being tilted towers.
What a fucking nerd neck!

He is building so fast, nerd neck!

Looser more like a nerd neck ha!
Nerd neck by D Sandwich Maker February 5, 2019
Word of the Day on June 25, 2026

love peace and chicken grease 

"another of sayin peace out or good bye"
Talk to ya later......Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease
Word of the Day on June 24, 2026
slip of the tongue perhaps,
Those idiots who drive around in a ridiculously raised pick up truck, making a top heavy vehicle even more top heavy and unstable
A:*gah*
B: "Whats the matter"
A: This dam prickup is blinding me.
B: Stupid thing's, as if there lights weren't blinding enough as it is.
prickup by lunasea September 28, 2009
Word of the Day on June 23, 2026