nethcev!'s definitions

Psychiatrist

A dandified drug dealer.

"Anybody who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined." --Samuel Goldwyn

by nethcev! September 20, 2006

Chicago

Like a speck of gold in a muddy riverbed, Chicago is the pearl of an otherwise abysmal region known as “the Midwest.”

"I spent my first year of college in Chicago at DePaul University. I learned that they call it "the windy city" because it truly blows to live there."

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

Anthropology

Sociology for the long since deceased.

"It's hard to find a job when your major is in anthropology."

by nethcev! August 23, 2006

Heaven

Whether an actual place, or merely a concept, the appeal of Heaven is that of another world – a better world – a fresh start – a second chance, to live in death what you had dreamt in life.

Heaven
Chinese food.
A Pacific breeze
An eternity to spend,
With not just a lover, but also a friend.

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

History

1. An argument for the cause of the present.
2. The study of man’s previous disasters, taught to ensure that future generations will never make the embarrassing mistake of repeating them, but will instead set about making new and even more complicated blunders.
3. The study of catastrophic events and the assholes that caused them. While preparing for an historical exam, one should note that any individual mentioned in the assigned textbook who was responsible for the death of at least a quarter of a million people, is probably worth mentioning on the test.

History is in itself an example.

by nethcev! August 20, 2006

Smile

An insignificant facial expression which is intended to suggest feelings of euphoria, satisfaction or relaxed complacency to others, but in actuality, more often serves as a social mask to disguise one’s true feelings.

Oh villain, villain, smiling, damned Villain!
My tables - meet it is I set it down,
That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain;
At least I'm sure it may be so in Denmark

Hamlet, Shakespeare

by nethcev! September 5, 2006

Rap

A particular genre of popular music which provides the listener with a symphonic experience that is on a par with having a stranger masturbate into one’s eardrum. This includes a throbbing, repetitive rhythm, or “beat” - which is equivalent to the motion of a hand running up and down the length of a male’s phallus - while simultaneously listening to some horny high school dropout rhyming and rambling off about his desire to “knock boots” with the listener, while concurrently threatening to “bust a cap in your ass” if the audience member refuses to respect his “slim shady.” To listen to rap music is essentially to be raped in the ear.

"Doctor Drae" is a rap artist.

by nethcev! September 9, 2006