matthew lake's definitions

plug seeking

The often desperate plight of the smartphone user. Said users are always looking for another hit of electricity to sustain the user's ever-increasing demand for power to support 3G and other intensive battery-draining device activities. Plug seekers can often be identified publicly in airports, coffeehouses or sitting along the walls of conference sessions.

A: Why is Barbara sitting all alone in the corner? Is she being anti-social today?
B: Nah -- she's plug seeking, and it's the only place she could find an open outlet. Another half-hour and she'll be forcibly powered down. Then you'll see anti-social.

by Matthew Lake February 26, 2010

cake-up

describes the application of excessive amounts of facial cosmetics.

Bitchy friend A: Sophie's facial rosacia is acting up again. She looks like shit.
Bitchy friend B: No wonder she was wearing cake-up when I saw her at the club last night. Not that it helped any.

or

Look at that bitch. She's wearing so much cake-up she looks like a drag queen.

by Matthew Lake June 11, 2006

soysage

Breakfast links or patties designed to mimic real sausage, but made of non-meat soy products.

Rachel: What's for breakfast?
Susie: French toast and soysage links!
Rachel: Delish!

by Matthew Lake November 8, 2007

borientation

Training sessions, corporate videos, processing meetings, human resources intakes; borientation involves plunging headfirst into the esoteric excrement of your new institutional identity. Its sole purpose is to wring the last vestiges of individualism from your soul before you begin your corporate, educational or other insipid journey.

Freddy: When do you start work?
Velma: Well, I think I'll probably start working on Wednesday, but first I have to endure two horrific days of borientation.

by Matthew Lake December 8, 2007

riskscape

A way of visualizing a certain set of risks, throughtfully drawn from the domain of all possible risks, and how they are associated with any given set of plans or circumstances. Imagined topographically, for instance, risks with a higher elevation would have a greater likelihood of manifesting negative consequences than risks at a lower elevation.

The planners of the Iraq invasion failed to fully describe the riskscape, and plan for all possible contingencies, relying instead on platitudes, such as 'we will be hailed as liberators.'

by Matthew Lake April 30, 2007

cake-up

A word used to describe the excessive application of facial cosmetics

DAMN ... that skank's foundation is so thick it might as well be called cake-up.

by Matthew Lake June 11, 2006

rantumentary

A documentary that advocates a particular, often strong, stance on an issue -- a film that is both a come to Jesus and a call to action.

George: Did you see Gore's 'An Inconvenient Truth'?
Dick: It was amazing. Quite the rantumentary, though it lacked some of the passion of Michael Moore's masterpiece 'Fahrenheit 9/11'.

by Matthew Lake October 3, 2006