loxi's definitions

father-in-law

The sainted man who lives with one's mother-in-law. Generally is known for having great patience.

My father-in-law is a gift from God, but my mother-in-law is a minion of the Devil.

by Loxi July 22, 2009

urban dictionary

An ingenious marketing ploy whereby the creators of the dictionary get written definitions from various authors via the web (which then becomes the intellectual property of the creators) who then bind them into a book entitled "Urban Dictionary" and hawk it to various publishing houses until one of them agrees to publish it and make them rich - while the various authors who contributed to the book remain poor.

The creators of the Urban Dictionary are geniuses!

by Loxi July 19, 2009

southern slam

A deliberate insult said to a person's face by a Southerner who is thought to be giving high praise, but is in fact thoroughly insulting the person. The slam is said in a heavy Southern drawl so as to fool the person into thinking you are stupid.

Example 1:

Upon seeing a woman approach wearing a hideous dress:

Southern Slammer: "Where eva did you get that dress? I simply must know. It takes my breath away!

Loosely translated: "That is the fugliest dress I have ever seen. I want to know where you got it so I can avoid that store like the plague!"

by Loxi July 19, 2009

sports jockey

Refers to a male with unfulfilled dreams of sports stardom who then pressures his children into playing sports in the hope they achieve the stardom he failed to achieve.

The sports jockey is the male equivalent of the stage mom.

Wife 1: (Sighing) My husband enrolled (insert child's name here) in softball, gymnastics, tennis, and track this year at school.

Wife 2: You poor thing. You married a sports jockey too?

by Loxi July 17, 2009

sibling

A child born of your mother's womb who is used as a unit of comparison in the family.

Mom: (Chiding) "Your brother sent me flowers for my birthday. Why can't you be more like him?"

Steve: "Ah, Mom! Can I help it if my sibling has more money to waste than me?"

by Loxi July 22, 2009

biracial

Neither 100% of this race nor 100% of that race. Basically the cause of much confusion when filling out application forms that require one to check a single box about their racial makeup.

A biracial (or multiracial) check box should be added to every application form - because this is the real world and very few people are 100% of any particular race (unless they inbreed - yuck!)

by Loxi July 20, 2009