27 definitions by Loxi
A citizen who listens intently to a police scanner all day and night so that he will know of all of the fires, murders, robberies, assaults, etc. that occur in his town. The PSP then gleefully informs his friends the next day of the gory details.
The PSP differs from the local policeman, fireman, or EMT with a scanner in that he has a pervy interest in listening to the scanner, not a professional interest.
The PSP differs from the local policeman, fireman, or EMT with a scanner in that he has a pervy interest in listening to the scanner, not a professional interest.
Dispatcher on Scanner: We have a 10-59 on 25th and Maple; a house is burning, a trauma team and a fire control team are en route.
Police Scanner Perv: Ssh, honey. I am trying to hear the scanner. I think your mother's house may be on fire!
Police Scanner Perv: Ssh, honey. I am trying to hear the scanner. I think your mother's house may be on fire!
by Loxi July 18, 2009
A boring-like speech given for an extended period of time by a so-called expert in his field for the sole purpose of teaching the audience a subject or valuable lesson.
Sermons are often delivered to the audience by total hypocrites, so please tread with caution.
Sermons are often delivered to the audience by total hypocrites, so please tread with caution.
Examples include:
1. Church sermons by a priest/pastor/preacher
2. Commencement addresses at graduation ceremonies
3. Parents to their children whenever they do something the parents used to do that they now feel is wrong
1. Church sermons by a priest/pastor/preacher
2. Commencement addresses at graduation ceremonies
3. Parents to their children whenever they do something the parents used to do that they now feel is wrong
by Loxi July 23, 2009
Action taken by a person who spys another person approaching whom he would like to avoid.
Evasive maneuvers include:
1. Ducking down an aisle or into a cubicle to avoid the person.
2. Turning around mid-stride and walking away from the person before he spys you.
3. Making up an elaborate (yet plausible) excuse to get away from the person, i. e. "I really want to chat, but I am late picking up my kids from daycare. It was good seeing you!"
4. Pretending to be engaged in some important act (i.e. a telephone call) so the person is forced to leave your presence.
Evasive maneuvers include:
1. Ducking down an aisle or into a cubicle to avoid the person.
2. Turning around mid-stride and walking away from the person before he spys you.
3. Making up an elaborate (yet plausible) excuse to get away from the person, i. e. "I really want to chat, but I am late picking up my kids from daycare. It was good seeing you!"
4. Pretending to be engaged in some important act (i.e. a telephone call) so the person is forced to leave your presence.
Upon seeing the office gossip approach, the clerk begins the evasive maneuver of grabbing a stack of folders and heading toward the file room.
by Loxi July 17, 2009
A naive female whose hymen has yet to be broken by a male during the act of sex. The virgin species is nearly extinct, as horny male hunters have trapped and taken nearly every hymen in the vicinity. If you are fortunate enough to come across a virgin, sweet words or alcohol will anesthetize her prior to de-hymening.
by Loxi July 19, 2009
Short for "lawn martyr". The lawtyr insists on doing the yard maintenance himself (mowing, landscaping, etc.) all the while complaining to everyone within earshot about having to do it -- and acting rather put upon.
The lawtyr is the natural foe of the housewife.
The lawtyr is the natural foe of the housewife.
Neighbor: What's the hubby up to today?
Wife: Ah, nothing much. He's just lawtyring around the house today.
Wife: Ah, nothing much. He's just lawtyring around the house today.
by Loxi July 17, 2009
The biggest reason for stress in most marriages and the number one cause of divorce in the United States.
by Loxi July 22, 2009
An ingenious marketing ploy whereby the creators of the dictionary get written definitions from various authors via the web (which then becomes the intellectual property of the creators) who then bind them into a book entitled "Urban Dictionary" and hawk it to various publishing houses until one of them agrees to publish it and make them rich - while the various authors who contributed to the book remain poor.
The creators of the Urban Dictionary are geniuses!
by Loxi July 19, 2009