failure33object's definitions

electtrivia

a form of musical escapism invented by the mystery that is Jethry Benadine. consists of off-key drum beats and severe battering of guitars. overexposure will result in blindness and/or deafness.

electtrivia - a big deathly cocktail of conflicting noise.

by failure33object April 30, 2005

uber-jacko

short for uber-Jackolas. a demonic resurrection of Saint Jackolas after he has died. uber-Jacko has uber-Jesus Juice which contains the extra ingredient of peppermint and a dash of pure oxygen. more of a danger to the youth population than measles and meningitis combined.

"capable of winning any checkers game, no matter how many opponents" - Rob McLean, uber-Jacko victim

by failure33object April 26, 2005

kfc popcorn chicken

the chosen gastronomic delight of checkers players the world over. although saint jackolas will claim responsibility, colonel sanders invented this delicacy in 1867, on the checkers battlefield.

"the colonal has outdone himself with this addictive and health damaging product...top draw fast food" - Rob McLean, checkers hero and popcorn chicken addict

by failure33object June 16, 2006

henry the 8th

a man of wealth and taste. was married to more people than he could count. so he killed each one of them. killed more people than AIDS ever will. owner of a particularly cool beard, also created the song greensleeves and was a founding father of the UCHaI (union of checkers heroes and icons). would have been a big fan of kfc popcorn chicken

Henry - "oi, peasant, where's moi woif?"
Peasant - "i don't know sir..."
Henry - "HANG THIS FOOL!"
Aide - "sir he didn't commit a crime."
Henry "GET BENT!! YOU DIE TOO!!!"

by failure33object April 24, 2005

bulbasaur

Alan Titmarch's worst nightmare, a plant which walks and can shoot razor leaves. also has the ability to whip folk with seeds. spotted frequently in Swansea, where he grows to enormous size due to the colossal amount of rain. his best attributes are his massive head. eats candy and mince beef.

most likely to say: "bulba, bulba!"
least likely to say: "what the blazes is that yellow mouse squawking for?"

by failure33object April 19, 2005

wizard of oz

a nutcase who rules a magical land from behind a curtain, despite being only 1.9 foot tall. often seen fighting with Toto. well known for being a roght miserable git. and also owner of a hot air balloon.

Wizard: "Toto give me back that sausage!"
Toto: *runs off with sausage*
Wizard: "you little bastard!!"

by failure33object April 18, 2005

winston churchill

the man! ceegar-chomping, country-beating, Hitler-dominating badass! the man who saved Britain from a future of camp haircuts and rotten food. and possible buggery. a very tough man who could stand up to anyone and scare them off.

the scene: a dinner party.
*Winston C farts loudly*
Aggrieved Gent: "How dare you pass wind in front of my wife!"
Winst: "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was her turn."

by failure33object April 24, 2005