dr. badwrench's definitions

French key

European slang for a Crescent wrench.

I need the damn French Key, this socket is too big.

by Dr. Badwrench September 25, 2008

Captain of the Carpet Ship

A title bestowed upon one who is drunk and passed out on the floor, like they are piloting the carpet.

Shit, man! You were Captain of the Carpet Ship last night.

by Dr. Badwrench September 22, 2006

pickled Jesus candles

Those tall jar candles with the bizarre, often gruesome, Catholic iconography on the outside of the jar. Usually found at Mexican markets, religious gift stores, and the ethnic food section at the supermarket.

Shop 'n' Rob in Bay Point has a great selection of pickled Jesus candles.

No, I'm not Catholic, I just like pickled Jesus candles.

by Dr. Badwrench July 12, 2007

crimmus

Du day uh da berf uh Jeebus

Merry Crimmus

I's got me a Escalade wit' Dubs fo' Crimmus

by Dr. Badwrench January 2, 2008

false Jerry

A Jerry Garcia look-alike. Doesn't have to be grey-haired and bearded, but from any era of Jerry.

I saw a false Jerry at the market, but he was like '66 Jerry, with big muttonchops.

by Dr. Badwrench May 26, 2008

brownie film

toilet paper, especially cheap one-ply

We need another roll of brownie film in the shitter!

by Dr. Badwrench June 25, 2006

bumper balls

A vehicle accessory for those who lack a pair of their own, consisting of a rubber scrotum and testes dangling from the underside of their bumper, trailer hitch, rear axle, etc.

bumper balls are a poor substitute for having a real pair, buddy.

by Dr. Badwrench April 6, 2008