7 definitions by UncleMikeNJ

Top Definition
Tactic used by football (soccer) teams, in which they play defensively for the entire game, in order to deny an apparently superior team any goals and escape with a scoreless draw and thus with one point, instead of risking it all and going for three points and possibly getting none.

Often involves pulling all 11 players in front of the ball, essentially daring the attacking team to send all 11 of theirs out.

Name is suggestive of putting a bus in front of the goal. One of several tactics referred to by football fans as "anti-football," and generally frowned upon by all but fans of the teams employing it.
Fan 1: "What do you mean, Arsenal only beat Sunderland 1-0? Arsenal have the best attack in the league!

Fan 2: "Well, you have to remember, mate, the Mackems like to park the bus."

Fan 1: "Oh yeah. No wonder Newcastle fans hate them so much."
by UncleMikeNJ September 30, 2009
A baseball term meaning a pitch thrown right where a batter likes to hit it.
Fan 1: "Jeter smacked that ball up the gap for a double, scoring Damon."
Fan 2: "Well, what did you expect? Papelbon put it right in his wheelhouse!"
by UncleMikeNJ October 03, 2008
Sometimes, you're wrong.

"Rule Fifty-One" was the title of the 7th season finale of the TV show "NCIS," referring to Special Agent Gibbs' established 50 rules for being a special agent of the Naval Criminal Investigative Service. At the end of the episode, in which he needed a lawyer, he went through a box with pieces of paper on which he'd written his rules, and one said, "#13 NEVER, EVER INVOLVE A LAWYER." He turned it over and wrote, "#51 SOMETIMES YOU'RE WRONG." A major admission for Gibbs, even to himself. If he can admit it, we all can.
DiNozzo: "Well, Ziva, it's like Ben Affleck said in 'The Hunt for Red October'... "

McGee: "Tony, Affleck didn't start playing Jack Ryan until 'The Sum of All Fears.' Alec Baldwin played Ryan in 'Red October.'"

DiNozzo: "Seriously, McGeek? YOU are challenging ME on a movie reference? I'm always right about these things, especially when Sean Connery is in the movie!"

Gibbs (slapping DiNozzo on the back of the head): "Rule 51."

DiNozzo: "Ow! Oh yeah: 'Sometimes, you're wrong.'"
by UncleMikeNJ July 07, 2011
A town of 60,000 people in Middlesex County, New Jersey, bisected by Route 9, but so dull and devoid of any worth that Bruce Springsteen gave up on writing a song about it around 1978 or so.

The town was formerly known as Madison Township. The name was changed in 1975 because the natives weren't smart enough to tell the difference between themselves and Madison Borough in North Jersey's Morris County.

Arch-rival of neighboring East Brunswick, and their jocks like to head up Route 18 to the Brunswick Square Mall and parade around in their purple-and-black OBHS varsity jackets as if they own the place, wondering why none of the storeclerks have what they want in stock. Then they go out to the parking lot and smoke, and wonder if it can get any better than this. Since they live in Old Bridge, it can't.

You can't spell "SLOB" without "OB."
"What do you know? You're from Sayreville!"
"I know, I know, but at least I'm not from Old Bridge!"
by UncleMikeNJ September 16, 2008
SMU
Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas. Once known for football success, including players like Doak Walker and Eric Dickerson, in 1987 they committed recruiting violations while already on probation, and the NCAA cancelled their program for a year, known as "the death penalty." While the program was revived, the team has rarely had a winning season since, and the school's reputation as a corrupt football factory has faded, allowing its other major reputation, that of a school for North Texas' richest and most shallow young people, to come to the forefront.
"Support Pro Football: Watch the SMU Mustangs." -- bumper sticker produced by University of Texas fans, 1980s
by UncleMikeNJ June 04, 2009
Name for British football club Chelsea after their purchase by Roman Abramovich, a Russian billionaire with questionable connections, who decided if you can't beat 'em, outspend 'em. This has led to two League titles and considerable trash-talking from their supporters, making Chelsea Britain's answer to American baseball's Boston Red Sox.
What would Chelski be without Russkie mob money?
The kind of stink they used to be, instead of the one they are now.
by UncleMikeNJ August 19, 2008
Town in northern New Jersey, neighboring Newark, bisected by the Garden State Parkway, containing Exits 148, 149, 150 and 151.

Has all the benefits of a small town and all the benefits of a city, and few of the drawbacks of either. Feels like about four small towns strung together, which would be the neighborhoods of Brookdale, North Broad, Downtown and Watsessing. Notable for large Irish and Italian communities, and for stores and restaurants that have been run by individual families for generations. Citizens have the legal right to punch you in the nose if you call their town a "suburb." (Not really, but they should!) In this town, they don't have pasta salad and therapists, they have pasta and bartenders. Municipal Building known for magnificent Christmas lights display.

Grove Street is the "other end" of the Newark City Subway system. Bus and train lines make it a convenient bedroom community for commuters to New York City. Bus lines also provide easy access to Newark, and the Willowbrook and Garden State Plaza malls.

Arch-rival is neighboring Montclair, which can't decide whether it wants to be upscale or ghetto fabulous. Also bordered by Nutley and Glen Ridge (both think of themselves as the former but really aren't), Belleville (not classy enough to be the latter), Clifton (Routes 3 and 46 going through it kind of makes up its mind for it) and East Orange (if you're not from there, do yourself a favor and don't go).

The most popular sports team among Bloomfielders is the New York Giants, followed by the Yankees, the New Jersey Devils, and, due to the Catholic influence, Seton Hall University basketball. In comparison, the Jets, Mets, Rangers and Rutgers are far behind in Bloomfield support.

Contrary to the Jersey stereotype, most Bloomfielders are willing to admit that the Eighties are over, guidos and ginkers are way out of style, big hair is no longer necessary for either gender, and hair metal sucked, except for Jersey natives Bon Jovi. Well, nobody's perfect, not even Bloomfielders.

Bloomfield is home to Holsten's, a fine old-fashioned ice cream parlor that stood in as a diner for the closing scene of the final episode of the TV show "The Sopranos." Any actual mob connections to the town appear to be strictly anecdotal, but just to advise youse, ya never know.
"What the hell are ya wearin'? A tracksuit? Where do ya think ya are, Belleville? Come on! This is Bloomfield! Have some class, will ya?"

"You're yellin' at me about class? Where do you think you're from, Montclair?"

"Hey, hey, pal, that's enough, you don't have to get nasty here!"
by UncleMikeNJ September 15, 2009

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