Uncle Des's definitions

Utica

Like being dead, but without the fun.

"I died and went to Utica."

"Utica failed in its bid to be twinned with Pluto"

by Uncle Des November 25, 2009

Bejeweled Blitz

A Facebook game that is like crack for housewives.

Me at 7:00am: "See you later honey. Don't play Bejeweled Blitz."
Her: "'Kay. 'Bye" She goes to computer
Me at 6:00pm: "I'm back. Honey: the house burned down and the kids are gone!!!!"
Her: "Shelly just got 127,000! I've got to beat her..."

by Uncle Des July 12, 2009

Booth Slapper

Basically what a booth babe turns into while you're at other tradeshows. Much in evidence due to the poor economy.

She's been divorced at least once; smokes; has a peeling tan; hugs every man she gets close to and the perfect specimen has both a stupid name (or a good name spelled oddly) and a job title that is actually one step up from receptionist if you look at it too closely enough.

Salesguy: "Hey, meet Janneene. She's our Director of Marcom Integration."
You: "Behind the booth slapper?!"

by Uncle Des July 18, 2009

Frinky

Descriptive of a somewhat scary chick, similar to the one who does the Progressive commercials. Kind-of cute; kind-of nuts; kind-of hot; kind-of totally mental. Probably goes like a train, but one that will run you over.

Derivation obscure - possibly a concatenation of "Frightening" and "Kinky"(?)

Guy 1:"Would you do that chick from the Progressive commercial?"

Guy2: "Mmmmm. Possibly. She's kinda frinky, though..."

by Uncle Des October 22, 2009

Canarsie

The aftereffect of either

1/ Super-hot Mexican or Indian food, or

2/ A huge, compacted poop that came out feeling like you were giving birth to a huge sandpaper baby through your butt.

Guy1: "You are walking funny: what happened?"
Guy2: "Feeling canarsie after that vindaloo last night..."

by Uncle Des July 26, 2009