The Gonzo Lecture's definitions
Someone appointed from another institution by a university to question every little, trivial detail of an assessment or graded paper in order to justify their own hefty stipend, make lecturers' lives annoyingly miserable (thus reminding them they are still only employees) and to feign the appearance of academic quality.
Elvira: Leo the external examiner has returned your examination for review because some of the questions require commas to be added. Make sure you do this before you leave the office at 2.30pm today.
Chuck: If all Leo has to do for his money is correct my grammar, then I'd be grateful if you'd ask him to stick that examination paper up his fat arse.
Chuck: If all Leo has to do for his money is correct my grammar, then I'd be grateful if you'd ask him to stick that examination paper up his fat arse.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010
Get the external examinermug. A word used by academics to confuse students and justify all manner of outrageous crimes against humanity in the name of education. It is primarily applied in situations when an academic requires the ability to smokescreen their own maladjusted intention and win unwinnable arguments with the minimum amount of effort.
Jane "Professor, I'd like you to explain to me why I got such a low grade."
Professor "Well I don't really have the time to explain the inner workings of pedagogy to you young lady. Even if i did, I'm not sure I could help you to understand."
Jane "Huh? What are you talking about?"
Professor "You see? Exactly."
Professor "Well I don't really have the time to explain the inner workings of pedagogy to you young lady. Even if i did, I'm not sure I could help you to understand."
Jane "Huh? What are you talking about?"
Professor "You see? Exactly."
by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010
Get the pedagogymug. A process carried out by university administrators in the Autumn term which involves shedding students who don't turn up regularly to classes to ensure they aren't charged fees and become an unnecessary financial burden to the institution. This is performed by the student being summarily "deregistered" on the grounds that they are "inadequately engaged" on their programme of study. As a result, students find they are suddenly unable to submit coursework or access any university facilities whatsoever, thus providing proof that they are indeed no longer engaged.
Chris the student: Hey professor! Why can't I submit coursework or access any online library facilities in order to complete my term papers?
Professor: You've probably become an unwitting victim of the most recent "Autumn Courtesy Flush."
Chris: What's that?
Professor: You've been deregistered because you haven't been coming to class.
Chris: My God! But if I can't submit assignments I'll fail the year.
Professor: Yes, well you should have thought of that, shouldn't you? Anyway, good luck with your career.
Professor: You've probably become an unwitting victim of the most recent "Autumn Courtesy Flush."
Chris: What's that?
Professor: You've been deregistered because you haven't been coming to class.
Chris: My God! But if I can't submit assignments I'll fail the year.
Professor: Yes, well you should have thought of that, shouldn't you? Anyway, good luck with your career.
by The Gonzo Lecture April 18, 2010
Get the Autumn Courtesy Flushmug. by The Gonzo Lecture March 10, 2010
Get the Intolerancemug. A practice developed on the London railway system by women to gain preferntial seating during rush hour periods. It involves confronting male passengers and asking them for their seat on the grounds that they are pregnant.
Female passenger: "can I please have your seat. I'm pregnant." (Whole carriage stares at man)
Male pssenger: "stop with yer foetus jacking, miss. I'm gonna need to see a copy of the ultrasound photo"
Male pssenger: "stop with yer foetus jacking, miss. I'm gonna need to see a copy of the ultrasound photo"
by The Gonzo Lecture March 9, 2010
Get the foetus jackingmug. Example 1
I was feeling really upset with my colleague, so I threw her under a bus. This was my fulfilment of a lifetime urge to actually practice the phenomenon to "throw under the bus".
Example 2
The driver confronted me and asked "what the fuck did you throw her under my bus for?"
I was feeling really upset with my colleague, so I threw her under a bus. This was my fulfilment of a lifetime urge to actually practice the phenomenon to "throw under the bus".
Example 2
The driver confronted me and asked "what the fuck did you throw her under my bus for?"
by The Gonzo Lecture March 10, 2010
Get the throw under the busmug. Derived originally from "Road Rage" but results in one commuter pushing another commuter onto the rail tracks.
The man was jailed for four years for rail rage when he pushed a woman onto the railway tracks because she asked him not to smoke on the platform.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 6, 2010
Get the Rail Ragemug.