7 definitions by Massivetrauma

Window Painting

One of meager mental capacity slapping their erect or flaccid penis against a clear pane of glass. Usually in a public setting to indicate either unparalleled elation or uncontrolled anxiety

Oh shit, is that Picasso? He window painting like a savage!

by Massivetrauma June 18, 2018

Poke the coconut

To put one's finger (any gender or lack thereof) or penis/male genitalia into a merpersons sexual orifice/s.

Yea, we met at this dope club unda da sea, had a couple clamshell cocktails and the next thing you know- I had to poke the coconut!

by Massivetrauma November 8, 2018

Pink Umbrella

A witty euphemism for vagina

Is it wet out? I turned that thirsty Pink Umbrella inside out

by Massivetrauma June 18, 2018

Long hug

Engaging in the physical merging in a "hug" for an extended period of time. Oftentimes making co-workers uncomfortable or leading them to believe that one or the other yearns for a union of hearts/minds/souls/bodies. Is often awkward and misinterpreted in the workplace environment, lasting over 6 seconds allowing one to "settle in" whether warranted or not

Girl: I dunno, he just long hugged me. Are we dating now?
Friend: Like how long did you guys hug?
Girl: A long time. Well over there 5 seconds...
Friend: Ooh, dang, he totally wants you!
Girl: Right!?

by Massivetrauma June 18, 2018

Intims

One who is intimidating. A modern and fresh option for the timid to quickly and succinctly highlight the object of their terror or one who is in a state of being intimidated

Shit, she's hella cute! I'm way too intims to talk to her! Or: That bitch is fly AF, she's got her shit on lock, hella intims!

by Massivetrauma June 18, 2018

Smaish

To utterly destroy anything and everything with notable force, without exception and with destructive feels. May or may not include sexual connotation... But it can... But not always... But maybe sometimes

If I don't smash properly, my girl them proceeded to smaish all that I hold dear

by Massivetrauma June 18, 2018

Posi

Pronounced Paw-zi. Truncated form of positive.

Adjective. Used with a potential amount of false hope through gritted teeth? Used with adequate sarcasm, (gritted teeth, faking it?) and /or forced positivity? Maybe utter dispair, hopelessness or total, abject suffering? We're not really sure HOW sarkie it is/can be... Honestly, the possibilities are endless, kids.

Me: I'm posi this guy is famous
Other human: nah
Me: swear
Other human: ...really?
Me: Posi *gnashing teeth*

by Massivetrauma July 10, 2018