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Malcolm X-crement's definitions

christmas

An ancient Roman Pagan festival that was given a "Christian" name in the fouirth century. Even though no one knows the date of Jesus Christs birth, it is for certain that it could not have been on Dec. 25th. Yet, people lie and say that Jesus was born on this day- and then they participate in all the old pagan customs, as if that honors Christ.
Think about it- what does putting a pine tree in your living room have to do with Jesus? Would Jesus approve of a huge lie that is perpetuated on kids every year about Santa Claus?
Why do Protestants celebrate a Catholic holiday- Christs' Mass?
Real Christians don't celebrate the Pagan, Catholic holiday of Christmas!
by Malcolm X-crement December 19, 2003
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Kegel

An alternate term for bowling- according to the noted linguistic expert, Fred Flintstone.
Hey Barn, care to go kegeling?
by Malcolm X-crement October 17, 2006
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Potsie

The coolest and most talented character on the 1970's sit-com Happy Days- played by Anson Williams. The characters full name was potsie Weber.
Richie!, It's Potsie!
by Malcolm X-crement December 27, 2003
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Howdy Doody

1. A classic childrens television show from the 1950's featuring Buffalo Bob, a ventriloquist who had, among characters, a wooden puppet named Howdy Doody.

2. What you say to the steaming pile of turds in the toilet, when you turn back to look at them.
"It's Howdy Doody time, boys and girls!

Howdy!, doody!
by Malcolm X-crement December 7, 2003
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fart

1. Noun: A flatus, expelled through the anus.
2: Verb: The act of expelling flatuses through the anus, usually fouling the surrounding air with a strong objectionable stench while producing a commical noise.
3: A contemptable or stupid person.
1. That fart that I just cut really smells good!
2. Open the window, I have to fart!
3. Mr. Crustybaum is such an old fart!
by Malcolm X-crement October 15, 2006
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quiet you

A term popularized in a cartoon from the 60's that starred a genius dog named Mr. Peabody. It was his trademeark phrase, often said to the child (whose name was Sherman) whom he would always be explaining history or science to (with his own unusual twist of course). Sherman would retort with a smart remark, to which Mr. Peabody would reply "Quiet, you!".
Sherman: "So you might say, it was a real Pow-wow."
Mr. Peabody: "Quiet, you!"
by Malcolm X-crement December 21, 2003
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Perfect Woman

Creature, much like Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, Sasquatch and the Good Nigger- often spoken of, but one has never actually been seen by a reputable witness.
I met the perfect woman last night, just before I sailed my yacht back to my mansion.....yeah...that's the ticket!
by Malcolm X-crement January 5, 2004
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