MagickDio's definitions
Verb- When someone manhandles your possessions in a spasticated manner, causing them to cease functioning correctly or wrecking them altogther.
For example, if someone were to pick up your new iphone, press a few things in an ill educated manner and return it, only for you to find later that you can no longer call anywhere except Greece, they will have seriously spandled it.
For example, if someone were to pick up your new iphone, press a few things in an ill educated manner and return it, only for you to find later that you can no longer call anywhere except Greece, they will have seriously spandled it.
by MagickDio June 21, 2011
Get the Spandlemug. Sitting on leather seats with bare skin on a hot day is asking for trouble. When you attempt to rise from the seat, you have to rip your skin from the surface that it has practically merged with, thus giving yourself a painful Leather Flaying experience. If you're lucky, you won't have made full body contact. Having sex on a leather sofa is a big mistake. 50% of the gasps and moans will be of pain as you tear your body away, leaving 6 layers of skin behind.
"Your back looks all sunburnt, Jim"
"It's not, I was shagging Vicky on the sofa and got a serious leather flaying"
"It's not, I was shagging Vicky on the sofa and got a serious leather flaying"
by MagickDio March 7, 2010
Get the Leather Flayingmug. A headline grabber is a person who is a HUGE attention seeker. If they are in some kind of trouble, ill, had an argument, or are bored, you'll know about it. And so will everyone else. People that can be legitimately titled "Headline Grabber" are;
1) Those that cut themselves and make sure everyone sees the wounds as they stare melodramatically into the distance
2)Those that think they "might be pregnant" all the time
3) Anyone who goes out wearing PVC trousers or a string vest
4)People who have got "such a headache" every time you speak to them, and the "stupid doctors" can't work it out
5)People who "just can't talk about it- no, don't make me! I can't tell you, it's too horrible"
6) Girls that tell their male friends that their boyfriend is a bastard, and then get them to start on him- only to declare undying love for him a few moments after the drama has subsided
1) Those that cut themselves and make sure everyone sees the wounds as they stare melodramatically into the distance
2)Those that think they "might be pregnant" all the time
3) Anyone who goes out wearing PVC trousers or a string vest
4)People who have got "such a headache" every time you speak to them, and the "stupid doctors" can't work it out
5)People who "just can't talk about it- no, don't make me! I can't tell you, it's too horrible"
6) Girls that tell their male friends that their boyfriend is a bastard, and then get them to start on him- only to declare undying love for him a few moments after the drama has subsided
"Ignore Shaz in her stupid PVC trousers and string vest. She thinks she's pregnant again. Fucking headline grabber"
"Look at those emo kids with their trendy arm slashes. Headline grabbers; let's hiss at them!"
"Look at those emo kids with their trendy arm slashes. Headline grabbers; let's hiss at them!"
by MagickDio March 15, 2010
Get the Headline Grabbermug. When a situation is more than just fucked, more than plain old dreadful, and you can't talk your way out of it, it's fierce wretched. Hella bad.
"My mum cam home early today and caught me and my brother fucking our boyfriends."
"Seriously?? That's fierce wretched"
"Seriously?? That's fierce wretched"
by MagickDio May 14, 2010
Get the Fierce Wretchedmug. Balls that are so hairy that they're actually cute, like a pair of adorable little pets. You know you've got fuzzles if your sexual partner has neglected to put their mouth anywhere near them, but doesn't object to grooming them.
by MagickDio February 6, 2010
Get the Fuzzlesmug. A serious outburst of unexpected and completely over the top rage. This style of hissy fit was made famous by former No. 1 ranking professional tennis player, John McEnroe, hence the name. To qualify as an episode of McEnrage, it has to happen in public, with witnesses. (That is not to say that Mr McEnroe did not throw his toys out of the pram in private, simply that we do not know if this is the case.) McEnrage can be a classic, all out, red in the face, foaming at the mouth screech fest, or it can be a much less dramatic thing, but with the inclusion of the phrase, "You cannot be SERIOUS!!"
"Why is Jez outside, chain smoking and pacing?"
"Oh my God, you totally missed it! Dude, it was insane. We got to the window and the woman said they were sold out. Instead of getting tickets to the next showing like the rest of us, he just flipped! Started screaming "You cannot be SERIOUS!!" and smacking his hands against that plastic window, swearing and demanding that he be found a seat immediately. That's his spit they're cleaning off the window now!"
"Jesus, proper McEnrage then!"
"Yeah. Fucking Jez, I don't reckon we'll ever be allowed back here now."
"Oh my God, you totally missed it! Dude, it was insane. We got to the window and the woman said they were sold out. Instead of getting tickets to the next showing like the rest of us, he just flipped! Started screaming "You cannot be SERIOUS!!" and smacking his hands against that plastic window, swearing and demanding that he be found a seat immediately. That's his spit they're cleaning off the window now!"
"Jesus, proper McEnrage then!"
"Yeah. Fucking Jez, I don't reckon we'll ever be allowed back here now."
by MagickDio October 11, 2012
Get the McEnragemug. 1)Moisturiser for men is Boysturiser. There's nothing wrong with a bit of moisturiser, but these products earn the term "boysturiser" because of their aggressive packaging. All coloured in various shades of "gun" with a bright trim, as if to say "This is a serious product, it's dangerous. But not so dangerous that it will burn your face off.It's safe to use. But ONLY by Real Men". Males who are concerned about looking "gay" for caring about their skin will purchase boysturiser. Men who don't give a damn how people perceive them will either use their partners moisturiser, buy a supermarket own brand, or buy whichever one was closest to them on the shelf at the time. As far as today's men are concerned, there are those who moisturise, and those who boysturise.
2) Men claim to women that they've "heard" that semen is good for the skin, in an attempt to have them readily agree to a dose to the face. They say it jokingly, but ever hopefully that the woman will say, "Really?? Because I've tried everything to get rid of this dry skin, but not that. Come on then, I want it all over" Because of this ridiculous male perpetrated myth, guys across the world are still self advertising the marvellous properties of their own "boysturiser". With a handy dispenser! Just stroke, rub and aim to achieve desired results! Satisfaction guaranteed! (note- satisfaction guarantee applies to dispensing party only.)
2) Men claim to women that they've "heard" that semen is good for the skin, in an attempt to have them readily agree to a dose to the face. They say it jokingly, but ever hopefully that the woman will say, "Really?? Because I've tried everything to get rid of this dry skin, but not that. Come on then, I want it all over" Because of this ridiculous male perpetrated myth, guys across the world are still self advertising the marvellous properties of their own "boysturiser". With a handy dispenser! Just stroke, rub and aim to achieve desired results! Satisfaction guaranteed! (note- satisfaction guarantee applies to dispensing party only.)
1) "Greg's just gone and spent £30 on boysturiser, when he could have got the same stuff from Asda for £10."
2) "I thought that the date was going well until he mentioned he had something to help my dry skin problem"
"Oh no, did he offer his boysturiser?"
"He sure did. And went home alone, presumably to boysturise his own right hand"
2) "I thought that the date was going well until he mentioned he had something to help my dry skin problem"
"Oh no, did he offer his boysturiser?"
"He sure did. And went home alone, presumably to boysturise his own right hand"
by MagickDio March 18, 2010
Get the Boysturisermug.