Len Bakerloo's definitions
prox· i· mate | \ˈpräk-sə-mət \ 1) A person you mate with who is close to you by kinship or in some other way. 2) A person who mates with you on behalf of another, i.e. a proxy mate.
Jack: Hey, are you and your second cousin still fuck buddies?
John: No. She moved to California, but she sent me Jill as her proximate, and she's awesome.
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Mike Pence is Donald Trump's kochsucker proximate for the one percenters.
John: No. She moved to California, but she sent me Jill as her proximate, and she's awesome.
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Mike Pence is Donald Trump's kochsucker proximate for the one percenters.
by Len Bakerloo December 22, 2018
Get the proximatemug. Notnomic was created by people who want to explore different forms of governance because although Nomic was originally invented by philosopher Peter Suber for that purpose, the discussion had become idiotic. Although (as of 2019) that hasn't happened to Notnomic yet, Nomicisists predict it will by the end of the 2020 election cycle, and if Trump is reelected for a third term in 2024, they expect Notnomic to be outlawed.
Note: Mathematical purists refer to the game as Aleph-Naught Nomic so as to make it clear that the game has a “countably infinite” number of turns in contrast to irrationally infinite number of turns. Regardless, Aleph-Naught Nomic's not Nomic.
Note: Mathematical purists refer to the game as Aleph-Naught Nomic so as to make it clear that the game has a “countably infinite” number of turns in contrast to irrationally infinite number of turns. Regardless, Aleph-Naught Nomic's not Nomic.
Bob: I'd like to call the 116th session of Notnomic to order.
Carol: I've rolled a 3. That makes the score for the Democrats 142,311,102 vs. 142,311,099 for the Republicans. I propose that we get rid of the filibuster. May we have a vote?
Ted: I've rolled a 5. That gives me the floor. First, I would like to point out that as a representative of the great state of Alabama, which joined the union on the fourteenth of December in, 1819, and which – if my math serves me right – is more than 100 years ago – has, I might add, the best primary school mathematics teachers in this great Union, who I will propose in forthcoming legislation that we honor by making ...
Alice: If we haven't repealed the second amendment yet, would someone please shoot that guy.
Carol: I've rolled a 3. That makes the score for the Democrats 142,311,102 vs. 142,311,099 for the Republicans. I propose that we get rid of the filibuster. May we have a vote?
Ted: I've rolled a 5. That gives me the floor. First, I would like to point out that as a representative of the great state of Alabama, which joined the union on the fourteenth of December in, 1819, and which – if my math serves me right – is more than 100 years ago – has, I might add, the best primary school mathematics teachers in this great Union, who I will propose in forthcoming legislation that we honor by making ...
Alice: If we haven't repealed the second amendment yet, would someone please shoot that guy.
by Len Bakerloo June 27, 2019
Get the Notnomicmug. E - means “everything” or more specifically, “Assume I’ve just told you everything you could possibly learn about me by other means and there is nothing more I might want to say.” The shortest possible conversation starter and ender. Saves considerable time and it deserves to be widely adopted.
Entomology: Before there was texting there was telegraphy. To save time, Morse code operators created abbreviations. For example: CQ means “Does anyone want to talk to me,” DE means “From,” OP means “operator,” QTH means “my location is,” and K means “over” (your turn to transmit).
In Morse a “dot” is three times as long as a “dash.” The shortest letter is “E” which is a single dot. The number 0 is “_ _ _ _ _”, 9 is “_ _ _ _ .” and 1 is “. _ _ _ _” so if a number was expected in context, then “cut letters” were substituted. For example Zero became “T” (a single dash), 9 became N (_ .) and 1 became. The area code 901 could be sent as NTA.
Entomology: Before there was texting there was telegraphy. To save time, Morse code operators created abbreviations. For example: CQ means “Does anyone want to talk to me,” DE means “From,” OP means “operator,” QTH means “my location is,” and K means “over” (your turn to transmit).
In Morse a “dot” is three times as long as a “dash.” The shortest letter is “E” which is a single dot. The number 0 is “_ _ _ _ _”, 9 is “_ _ _ _ .” and 1 is “. _ _ _ _” so if a number was expected in context, then “cut letters” were substituted. For example Zero became “T” (a single dash), 9 became N (_ .) and 1 became. The area code 901 could be sent as NTA.
Before the internet, a Morse code conversation between two amateur radio operators might go like this:
CQ DE WB6ACU K (WB6ACU wants to see if anyone wants to talk to him)
WB6ACU DE N6YOS K (N6YOS says she would like to. This is followed by a preliminary exchange of names and locations before much else is said.)
N6YOS DE WB6ACU OP IS JOE QTH IS STUDIO CITY CA K
WB6ACU DE N6YOS OP IS PRISCILLA QTH IS NASHVILLE TN K
But now with the internet, you can google any call sign and learn everything there is to know about anyone, so a more efficient way communicating goes like this:
CQ DE WB6ACU K
AB6ACU DE N6YOS K
N6YOS DE WB6ACU E K
WB6ACU DE N6YOS E K
… at this point both operators are free to see if anyone else wants to talk to them...
CQ DE WB6ACU K (WB6ACU wants to see if anyone wants to talk to him)
WB6ACU DE N6YOS K (N6YOS says she would like to. This is followed by a preliminary exchange of names and locations before much else is said.)
N6YOS DE WB6ACU OP IS JOE QTH IS STUDIO CITY CA K
WB6ACU DE N6YOS OP IS PRISCILLA QTH IS NASHVILLE TN K
But now with the internet, you can google any call sign and learn everything there is to know about anyone, so a more efficient way communicating goes like this:
CQ DE WB6ACU K
AB6ACU DE N6YOS K
N6YOS DE WB6ACU E K
WB6ACU DE N6YOS E K
… at this point both operators are free to see if anyone else wants to talk to them...
by Len Bakerloo November 8, 2019
Get the Emug. Two single word (or 64 binary digits) capable of expressing numbers as large as 1.7 E 308, which is 1 E 206 times the number of atoms in the known universe. (1.7 E 308 means 1.7 times 10 raised to the 308th power.)
Why did the system crash? After we got sued for coding gender as binary we decided to use double word floats instead. That worked in beta test in New York but when we brought California on-line the whole thing crashed.
by Len Bakerloo June 17, 2018
Get the Double Word Floatmug. The act of putting a silent “p” in front of a word so that one can create a new word that is pronounced exactly the same way so as to distinguish it from all other instances of the same word. A psmithsized word can mean exactly the same thing, something completely different or anything in between.
The word was first coined by Rupert Psmith, a much loved fictional character from phumor writer P. G. Wodehouse. According to Psmith himself, the P is silent “as in pshrimp” and he added it to distinguish himself from other Smiths. Some scholars believe that the “P.” in P. G. Wodehouse was in fact a psmithization by G. Wodehouse, however others believe this ptheory is a bunch of pbaloney.
Needless to say, psmithisize is pronounced the same way as smithisize although it means something completely different.
The word was first coined by Rupert Psmith, a much loved fictional character from phumor writer P. G. Wodehouse. According to Psmith himself, the P is silent “as in pshrimp” and he added it to distinguish himself from other Smiths. Some scholars believe that the “P.” in P. G. Wodehouse was in fact a psmithization by G. Wodehouse, however others believe this ptheory is a bunch of pbaloney.
Needless to say, psmithisize is pronounced the same way as smithisize although it means something completely different.
Bob: Honey, now that we've both read Cat's Cradle you'll have to admit that we form a duprass. We're clearly a karass of two people with a bond so strong that even our children cannot invade our union.
Carol: No way. While it's true that neither of us care squat about the kids, Bokonism claims that the two members of a duprass die within a week of each other. Not me, babe. You kick the bucket and I'm finding myself a new squeeze post-haste.
Bob: All that kicking off together is just foma but just to make it clear, let's psmithisize it and say we are members of the same pduprass. Deal?
Carol: Deal.
Carol: No way. While it's true that neither of us care squat about the kids, Bokonism claims that the two members of a duprass die within a week of each other. Not me, babe. You kick the bucket and I'm finding myself a new squeeze post-haste.
Bob: All that kicking off together is just foma but just to make it clear, let's psmithisize it and say we are members of the same pduprass. Deal?
Carol: Deal.
by Len Bakerloo June 26, 2019
Get the psmithisizemug. A federal agency established after 9/11/2001 to carry on the work of the terrorists. They help us fear nature by taking over FEMA and diverting funds that would have been spent on hurricane relief to equip meter maids with assault rifles. Constant reminders to "report suspicious behavior" to the police have made us fear each other and criminalized social anxiety disorder. Thanks to their fine efforts, being too shy to ask a girl for sex is now as likely to get you investigated as asking a girl for sex.
by Len Bakerloo June 16, 2018
Get the Homeland Securitymug. IMHO IYHO is a game that two people can play through any texting medium.
It is role-playing game for two people who play as the Egotist (E) and the Satirist (S).
The Egotist initiates play by typing:
's1' IMHO
where 's1' is a statement that is anything but humble.
The Satirist responds with
IYHO s2
Where s2 seems like a compliment to E because he is an Egotist, but is in fact a small work of satire.
Anyone can issue a call to play IMHO IYHO by simply ending a message with IMHO. They can even issue the invitation without knowing it and when the Satirist responds with a IYHO they are off to the races even if the player issuing the invitation has no idea what is going on.
Notes:
1) IMHO = In My Humble Opinion and IYHO = In Your Humble Opinion. I have to tell you this because you're too lazy to look it up, IMHO.
2) You can issue a call for someone to play as an egotist by simply sending IMHO with no s1. This is called a "null IMHO" and it the equivalent of saying, "I have a great knock-knock joke. Start it off."
3) The game is pronounced "I'm ho, Eww ho." A player is referred to as a ho and two of them are "a pair of hos."
It is role-playing game for two people who play as the Egotist (E) and the Satirist (S).
The Egotist initiates play by typing:
's1' IMHO
where 's1' is a statement that is anything but humble.
The Satirist responds with
IYHO s2
Where s2 seems like a compliment to E because he is an Egotist, but is in fact a small work of satire.
Anyone can issue a call to play IMHO IYHO by simply ending a message with IMHO. They can even issue the invitation without knowing it and when the Satirist responds with a IYHO they are off to the races even if the player issuing the invitation has no idea what is going on.
Notes:
1) IMHO = In My Humble Opinion and IYHO = In Your Humble Opinion. I have to tell you this because you're too lazy to look it up, IMHO.
2) You can issue a call for someone to play as an egotist by simply sending IMHO with no s1. This is called a "null IMHO" and it the equivalent of saying, "I have a great knock-knock joke. Start it off."
3) The game is pronounced "I'm ho, Eww ho." A player is referred to as a ho and two of them are "a pair of hos."
Trump: I would have to give myself an A+ when it comes to the bigness of my IQ quotient, IMHO.
Adams: IYHO there is no question you deserve to win in November since your smarts is the biggerest.
Trump: You should write a book about how bigly I'll win, IMHO.
Adams: IYHO a satirist should write a book about how great you. Good idea. Anyway, I've enjoyed playing IMHO IYHO with you.
Trump: So, you saw me with that pair of hos on TV. I agree, those hos were so eww; I've been with 10 times better, IMHO.
Adams: IYHO there is no question you deserve to win in November since your smarts is the biggerest.
Trump: You should write a book about how bigly I'll win, IMHO.
Adams: IYHO a satirist should write a book about how great you. Good idea. Anyway, I've enjoyed playing IMHO IYHO with you.
Trump: So, you saw me with that pair of hos on TV. I agree, those hos were so eww; I've been with 10 times better, IMHO.
by Len Bakerloo June 26, 2019
Get the IMHO IYHOmug.