L.MARTIN's definitions
FOR AVERAGE JOE HETEROSEXUAL:The point at which if a woman has'nt decided to do you(Trust me.-She knows.)...END.ALL.CONTACT! Either she's not into you...or worse...she'll continue to let you waste money time and attention on her.Painful as it may be-turn the page.Helpful hint:The wealthier you become...the more the world looks like a catalog.
FOR LESBIANS & GAYS: Shorten this to the "TWO EYEBLINK RULE"
Lucky fux!
FOR LESBIANS & GAYS: Shorten this to the "TWO EYEBLINK RULE"
Lucky fux!
DUDE 1:"So you takin' Mandy out tonite?"
DUDE 2:"Hell no.She talks too much.She keeps reminding me how incredibly smart she is...And to top it off she's maxed out the "TWO DATE RULE".Next.
DUDE 2:"Hell no.She talks too much.She keeps reminding me how incredibly smart she is...And to top it off she's maxed out the "TWO DATE RULE".Next.
by L.MARTIN September 27, 2005
Get the TWO DATE RULEmug. The person in any organization-usually a sports team-who is
good enough to have a lead role.Too bad they're being blocked
by someone already in that coveted spot who's actually quite
good too.
good enough to have a lead role.Too bad they're being blocked
by someone already in that coveted spot who's actually quite
good too.
EXAMPLE 1/BUSINESS WRITER TO COLLEAGUE:"If Dick Parsons is #1
at Time Warner,Jeff Bewkes must be 1A.Surely the guy will get his own company to run someday."
EXAMPLE 2/NFL 1A QUARTERBACKS:David Garrard....Gus Frerotte...John Kitna...Brad Johnson.
at Time Warner,Jeff Bewkes must be 1A.Surely the guy will get his own company to run someday."
EXAMPLE 2/NFL 1A QUARTERBACKS:David Garrard....Gus Frerotte...John Kitna...Brad Johnson.
by L.MARTIN January 15, 2006
Get the 1Amug. A defining moment when you realize the gods are aligned against you in pursuit of a goal...That and the realization that your handlers/advisors are either stupid or covertly sabotaging you.In either case they should all be fired.
ANCHORMAN:"Subsequent candidates looking to challenge SENATOR CLINTON have all suffered a PAGE 10 MOMENT. Leaving her little choice but to polish her acceptance speech."
by L.MARTIN December 7, 2005
Get the PAGE 10 MOMENTmug. 1)The root cause of divorce.
2)The most successful wealth transfer scheme ever invented.
3)A contract-that if presented to you by an agent/lawyer-would
be sufficient grounds for a legal malpractice suit.
4)One sure way that the state can stay involved in your
life.FOREVER.
5)The point at which regular good sex stops...and infrequent
sex for procreation,manipulation,and/or passive-aggressive
destruction begins.
6)An institution that should be scrapped in favor of 1-3-5
year contracts...Not that you'll be any happier.
2)The most successful wealth transfer scheme ever invented.
3)A contract-that if presented to you by an agent/lawyer-would
be sufficient grounds for a legal malpractice suit.
4)One sure way that the state can stay involved in your
life.FOREVER.
5)The point at which regular good sex stops...and infrequent
sex for procreation,manipulation,and/or passive-aggressive
destruction begins.
6)An institution that should be scrapped in favor of 1-3-5
year contracts...Not that you'll be any happier.
by L.MARTIN July 5, 2006
Get the MARRIAGEmug. by L.MARTIN September 15, 2005
Get the Mashmug. The fantasy of collectors everywhere-(mostly automotive)-that they'll stumble upon a mint condition vintage 'Benz or Ferrari
in a barn or airplane hangar somewhere between N.Y/L.A....owned by someone just happy to get rid of it.Uh-huh.
in a barn or airplane hangar somewhere between N.Y/L.A....owned by someone just happy to get rid of it.Uh-huh.
COLLECTOR:"My 300SL Roadster was a BARN FIND from an estate sale on a river town in Southern Indiana.Family was just happy to be rid of the thing at 90k.Imagine that!"
COLLECTOR 2:"Enough with your fish stories!Even in desperation
nobody let's that rig go for less than 300K.There's photos of you at Barrett Jackson last month anyway."
COLLECTOR 2:"Enough with your fish stories!Even in desperation
nobody let's that rig go for less than 300K.There's photos of you at Barrett Jackson last month anyway."
by L.MARTIN October 14, 2005
Get the BARN FINDmug. Many talented people are very smart and good at what they do.Unfortunately they're very dumb about everything else...especially money.Don King knows this about fighters when he walks them into a conference room...has an assistant
open a briefcase with 100grand in it...and tells the fighter it's his as an advance for signing on with him.You've never seen that much money before.Of course-as your career takes off-you begin to realize that his "management fees" make the taxes look small.This does'nt just happen to atheletes.
open a briefcase with 100grand in it...and tells the fighter it's his as an advance for signing on with him.You've never seen that much money before.Of course-as your career takes off-you begin to realize that his "management fees" make the taxes look small.This does'nt just happen to atheletes.
Bill Gates...or Terry Semel...or Barry Diller...wants to "take a meeting"with you.He offers you 100 million for your company ...and "total control" before you even sit down. You try to avoid choking on your coffee.All those years in your cubicle at 80 grand a year.Of course you bite...and watch helplessly as you find that "total control" means you can leave work early on Friday.His henchmen then take your baby and turn it into a multi-billion dollar market leader...or more likely destroy
it before it destroys them.Classic DON KING MOMENT.
it before it destroys them.Classic DON KING MOMENT.
by L.MARTIN February 3, 2006
Get the DON KING MOMENTmug.