L.MARTIN's definitions
SEX AFFORDABILITY DYNAMIC....One more reason why it's better to be rich.As a straight man...once you get over the age of 25...if you're not rich or famous...generally speaking the quality of pussy you're able to fuck levels off.In fact it quite probably nosedives.The "young n'dumb n'drunk" MIGHT do you...But the "young n'sober/ambitious n'hot" will probably pass.This would explain why Average Joe in his mid-to late 20's claims to really dig older women.That's all that'll do your mediocre ass.
GYM MANAGER:"Unbelievable!This guy who just joined is uglier than the bottom of my shoe...but he walked in with this total babe."
FEEX GUY:"Must be the Bentley GT they pulled up in.Tsk
tsk...it's S.A.D."
FEEX GUY:"Must be the Bentley GT they pulled up in.Tsk
tsk...it's S.A.D."
by L.MARTIN November 5, 2005
Get the S.A.D.mug. A 30something to 50something man of modest to respectable accomplishment who lands an attractive but no longer hot
female.She's either been buried in her own professional
accomplishments and finally looked up to find those men she
competes with are only interested in "young n'tight"...Or she's badly overplayed her hand and now finds that the trips to Tahiti and leased Benzos are'nt part of the picture anymore at that 30something range.In steps the CADDY.To him-she's quite a catch.To her-he will just have to do."Here...hold my purse while I try these shoes on."
female.She's either been buried in her own professional
accomplishments and finally looked up to find those men she
competes with are only interested in "young n'tight"...Or she's badly overplayed her hand and now finds that the trips to Tahiti and leased Benzos are'nt part of the picture anymore at that 30something range.In steps the CADDY.To him-she's quite a catch.To her-he will just have to do."Here...hold my purse while I try these shoes on."
CHICK:"Alberto!...how nice to see you!(hug)Hope everything is
well."
CADDY:"Who was that?"
CHICK:"Just a dear friend from my investment banking days in
New York.Don't forget my shopping bags."
well."
CADDY:"Who was that?"
CHICK:"Just a dear friend from my investment banking days in
New York.Don't forget my shopping bags."
by L.MARTIN October 30, 2005
Get the CADDYmug. The financial number at which you can opt not to work.It's different for everyone...but generally speaking...if you buy into the "American Way of Life"...that number is somewhere around 5million liquid.At that point-you have a barrier against "the unforseen"(illness/injury)...or the fully known. (divorce/criminal children)Hefty appettite for booze,sex,and gambling?Triple that number.
Between his ex-wives,children,and jet set travel-James the attorney has a higher FUCK YOU NUMBER than Joe the plumbing contractor.
by L.MARTIN September 26, 2005
Get the FUCK YOU NUMBERmug. The almost freakish obsession that second and third generation young women from the the Far East,Pacific Islands,and the Carribean have for dorky...socially inept...cornball white guys.(It's never the cool ones.)He's "safe"...he's got a professional gig...he digs Toyota Camrys.How exciting.
BLACK GUY 1:"Think I'll go over chat up that hot Korean babe."
ITALIAN GUY 2:"Save it.She's so SNOWBLIND that she masturbates to Bill Gates posters."
ITALIAN GUY 2:"Save it.She's so SNOWBLIND that she masturbates to Bill Gates posters."
by L.MARTIN October 17, 2005
Get the SNOWBLINDmug. A 40-50something western-educated doctor/engineer/venture capitalist who marries...or arranges to marry an American white girl.He is usually Indian,Persian,or Arab and smitten with things Western.She's usually 30something,educated,sorta hot in that"polished babe" kinda way.
BANKER 1:"See Mahmoods' new bride? Rather attractive blonde.
Wonder what his family thinks."
BANKER 2:"REVERSE MAIL-ORDER.Wonder if she's been to dinner
yet."(mild chuckle)
Wonder what his family thinks."
BANKER 2:"REVERSE MAIL-ORDER.Wonder if she's been to dinner
yet."(mild chuckle)
by L.MARTIN October 27, 2005
Get the REVERSE MAIL-ORDERmug. While many beautiful women may post their profile and picture on an internet dating site...the only ones that you MR. AVERAGE JOE HETEROSEXUAL will hook up with are the 5's...and SINGLE MOTHERS.The 8,9,10 girl has her picture up for ego-grat
purposes.She's only available if you can somehow PROVE INCOME.
You know what I mean.
purposes.She's only available if you can somehow PROVE INCOME.
You know what I mean.
HONEST DRINKIN' BUDDY #1:"It's been awhile.I just had to clear the pipes.Hooked up with this cute single mom off MATCH.Not goin' back."
HONEST DRINKIN' BUDDY #2:"Yeah...I'm doin'okay now but awhile back I found myself in bed with this gnarly 5 off MYSPACE.I guess that's just INTERNET DATING REALITY."
HONEST DRINKIN' BUDDY #2:"Yeah...I'm doin'okay now but awhile back I found myself in bed with this gnarly 5 off MYSPACE.I guess that's just INTERNET DATING REALITY."
by L.MARTIN January 15, 2006
Get the INTERNET DATING REALITYmug. Someone who lacks authority or power.When giving orders...or leading people...those you lead are more likely to follow if they respect your ability & competence.Otherwise-you might just as well be wearing something pink.
PROJECT MANAGER:"The schedule has us pouring the foundation tomorrow.Let's get 'er done!"
CONSTRUCTION WORKER:"Has this guy ever ever poured more than a cup of coffee? We're not even done tying the steel."
FOREMAN:"I'll deal with it.He's the Architects' nephew.Tryin' to get some work experience."
WORKER:"Oh great.The arky sends a PINK SWEATER out here to
bark orders.Send his ass to Starbuks."
CONSTRUCTION WORKER:"Has this guy ever ever poured more than a cup of coffee? We're not even done tying the steel."
FOREMAN:"I'll deal with it.He's the Architects' nephew.Tryin' to get some work experience."
WORKER:"Oh great.The arky sends a PINK SWEATER out here to
bark orders.Send his ass to Starbuks."
by L.MARTIN November 17, 2005
Get the PINK SWEATERmug.