5 definitions by Johnny Asswipe IV

The act of competing against others by attempting to successfully perform the "Penis Monkey Surgery" the quickest.
Man 1: "Did you see Tommy's new time on the Penis Monkey Challenge?"

Man 2: "Yes, I believe his time was 1:38!"
by Johnny Asswipe IV March 9, 2021
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The act of surgically attaching an 8+ inch male Homo Sapien penis to a monkey, (preferably a chimpanzee) and then dubbing said monkey a "Penis Monkey".
Did you hear about the Zoo's new attraction? It's a Penis Monkey!
by Johnny Asswipe IV July 10, 2020
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A challenge that must be completed with two willing participants, preferably one male and one female. The two participants, both engaging in oral sex with one another in a 69 position, must have the male participant on the bottom. While the male is about to reach orgasm, the female must grab ahold of the male’s penis, and shoot an arch into the air with ejaculate, in which the male then must catch the flying load in his own mouth. The male then must attempt to impregnate the woman through his own mouth, thus; fully completing the hammock challenge.
Male 1: “I have some bad news…”
Male 2: “No way! What happened?!”
Male 1: “I think I impregnated my girlfriend while doing the hammock challenge…”
Male 2: “That’s awesome dude!”
by Johnny Asswipe IV October 10, 2022
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(To sim, the act of simming, simmed in the past tense). The act of devoting your entire life to your first girlfriend at an early age, stopping any and all contact with all your friends, apply and almost attend college but drop your courses the week school starts in pursuit of a receptionist job at a small town insurance agency.
MAN 1: "Hey, what ever happened to Dave?"

MAN 2: "Oh Dave... yeah... Dave totally simmed out. He works for insurance now."

MAN 1: "That's a shame."
by Johnny Asswipe IV January 10, 2023
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The act of “69ing” on a hammock, except when the male is about to reach climax, the female forces the man to ejaculate into his own mouth/facial area, impregnating the woman with his own face.
man #1: “Hey did you hear about what Dalton did on the 4th of July?”

man #2: “No, what’d he do?”
man #1: “He totally was hammocking with his girlfriend!”
man #2: “No way! That’s sick!”
by Johnny Asswipe IV September 23, 2022
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