8 definitions by Elwood Lane

Top Definition
The Southwest variant of the bro. This particular bro is known to disproportionately populate ASU, U of A and most UC schools between LA and the Mexico border.

They love Mexican beer, Chipotle and energy drinks. They tend to wear shorts, flips flops, jersey's/wife beaters, SPY type sunglasses, straight billed hats or their hair in some "clever bed head" style. The most devoted ones will rock the soul patch. They will covered in enough AXE spray to make you puke and will constantly be texting hussies on their Droid or IPhone. They will drive their black lifted F-150 at a constant speed of 50-60 mph through every residential zone and will burn out at every red light. Avenged Sevenfold will be blasted at a deafening volume while driving.

Lastly, everything and everybody will be "gay" or be a "total pussy ass fag." Additionally, school is to be despised. The only appropriate conversations are: how much head and/or pussy you get or are going to get, sports and how much it sucks to have work 5 hours for your dad's landscaping company this weekend even though you'll just boss Mexican's around and get $300.

If you spot one of these creatures, do not be alarmed. Simply point, laugh and go about your business. They are simply overgrown 14 year spoiled boys that will never grow up. More than likely they will get arrested for domestic abuse, committing a hate crime or get caught cheating and have half their assets taken away in the divorce.
I would love to get to my class on time, but all these brochacho cheesedicks are blocking the road with their lifted trucks and glamis stickers.
by Elwood Lane July 02, 2011
The dad-stache is a unique moustache that is perhaps the pinnacle of all staches. While it appears similar to a 70s porn stache, it is not quite the same since it is not as creepy.

Males can only grow one of these badboys once they have had a kid (in particular a son). It is a biologic reaction that has evolved through the years because such a moustache commands respect from ones offspring and in general demonstrates clear bad-assery.
You kind of had this nasty scum stache vibe going on until your wife had your son. Then all the sudden you developed a wicked dad-stache that made Burt Reynolds look like a pubescent cheeseball!
by Elwood Lane July 14, 2012
A level of measurement, in this case it denotes one 1.75 L bottle of hard alcohol.

You're guaranteed to find at least one of these hidden in every white, suburban pantry. Their main purpose is to sedate soccer moms and allow their underage kids to get shit housed and try to play tennis with the cat.
Man, last night was boring as hell until Mark found his mom's dysfunctional family sized bottle of Cuervo. Next thing I know we turned his living room into a slip n' slide and Ashley puked in the china cabinet.
by Elwood Lane November 04, 2012
The phenomenon in which two acquaintances/friends, both recently single after the dissolution of a long term relationship, become engaged in a purely sexual relationship. This must occur very shortly after the dissolution of said long term relationship.

This phenomenon is quintessentially mutual and void of strategic action and time ordering of events beyond the fact that both of your past relationships ended around the same time. Put bluntly, you both become single and then bam, one night you just start to hook up.
Person 1: It was really strange. Last night I thought I heard Adam leaving Jen's room.

Person 2: Ya that's kinda weird. They both just broke up with their ex's a couple weeks ago

Person 1: I think we're witnessing the MRS phenomenon

Person 2: Huh?

Person 1: Mutual-rebound-sex
by Elwood Lane January 26, 2013
A type of apology typically given by bros of all types and ages. At its core, it's a classic non-apology, apology (i.e. "I'm sorry I'm not sorry"). It emanates out their supreme arrogance and hegemonic masculine need to be dominant, and thus never wrong.

You often see this type of apology come out of the mouth of a bro who's been caught doing something controversial and is forced to apologize; however, they obviously think that everybody is just over-reacting, or being hyper PC, and they should not have to apologize, but will do so in order to get everyone off their back.

"Ugh, okay, I give you a bropology. I'm guess I'm sorry...sorry that you're such a gay ass pussy bitch that you can't hack my (insert sexist/racist/xenophobic/hyper masculine opinions and behavior here). Fuckin' sack up, bro."
"Ugh, okay, I'll give you a bropology. I'm guess I'm sorry...sorry that you're such a gay ass pussy bitch that you can't hack my (insert sexist/racist/xenophobic/hyper masculine opinions and behavior here). Fuckin' sack up, bro."
by Elwood Lane May 28, 2014
A general slang term for Christians.
This Christ-a-roni kid flipped a hard B in biology today and stormed outta class.

I was driving through Oklahoma looking at all the billboards and man, there are some serious ass Christ-a-ronis in that state.
by Elwood Lane December 02, 2014
a highly mobile, agile and shifty ass fupa with extremely sharp claws.they are most commonly found in areas which contain a large concentration of yuppie middle age women with fupas that happen to work out alot.

beware. these fupa's are crafty.
i was walking home yesterday and I fuckin got chased by a velocofupa....it crept up outta the high grass
by Elwood Lane November 21, 2007

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