24 definitions by Charitable Disguise
A long lasting, iron hardened (stiff) penile erection (element), fortuitously triggered from aural/audio stimuli.
{Ca. 2008: Dr. Culvitude of Copenhagen was conducting a routine laboratory experiment on 45 male rats to determine the impacts of dopamine on emotional contentment, when he surreptitiously observed that 100% of the rat population developed reactionary priapisms from increased dopamine levels directly related to auditory stimulus. Culvitude concluded that musical vibes the 45 heard from harmonic choral & instrumental patterns pertaining to the song 'Upriser' from ''de-vice", incited Paraventricular neural synergy between the Gyrus, Putamen & Hypothalamus resulting in a bombardment of hormone laden blood flowing to the rats' Glans Penii. In lieu of his findings, Dr. Culvitude & his partner, Sir Michael Bonerman, coined the term "Stiff Element" and have utilized material from select musical acts: de-vice, Vibe 45, and S&C as a means to equip elderly males, such as Hambone and Chuck, with enigmatic erections, capable of busting through a wrought iron enforced cinder block wall.}
{Ca. 2008: Dr. Culvitude of Copenhagen was conducting a routine laboratory experiment on 45 male rats to determine the impacts of dopamine on emotional contentment, when he surreptitiously observed that 100% of the rat population developed reactionary priapisms from increased dopamine levels directly related to auditory stimulus. Culvitude concluded that musical vibes the 45 heard from harmonic choral & instrumental patterns pertaining to the song 'Upriser' from ''de-vice", incited Paraventricular neural synergy between the Gyrus, Putamen & Hypothalamus resulting in a bombardment of hormone laden blood flowing to the rats' Glans Penii. In lieu of his findings, Dr. Culvitude & his partner, Sir Michael Bonerman, coined the term "Stiff Element" and have utilized material from select musical acts: de-vice, Vibe 45, and S&C as a means to equip elderly males, such as Hambone and Chuck, with enigmatic erections, capable of busting through a wrought iron enforced cinder block wall.}
1. Chuck has been using his Stiff Element to exhibit superior carnal endurance, while at the same time wielding it as a weaponized instrument of aural dominance.
2. "Stiff Element is another way to characterize/describe a scandalously hard erection that lasts for a long time.", Sir Michael Bonerman (or Big B) explained to George and Kat during the medical conference at the Hawaiian Institute of Genitalogy.
2. "Stiff Element is another way to characterize/describe a scandalously hard erection that lasts for a long time.", Sir Michael Bonerman (or Big B) explained to George and Kat during the medical conference at the Hawaiian Institute of Genitalogy.
by Charitable Disguise February 2, 2020
Words and phrases specifically manufactured/defined in order to mislead careless, irresponsible and deceptive journalists/writers.
{An innovative, percussive and aggressive method/style of writing wherein the author intentionally creates a word/phrase and a definition for the word/phrase as a weaponized literary instrument, objectively targeting and penetrating conventional thinking, culturally imposed dogmatic norms and multi-layered veils of psychosocially nurtured concepts. Ballistic Prose is a baiting tactic aimed in the direction of reckless, quasi-intellectual journalism with the supreme achievement occuring when journalists utilize such manufactured, Ballistic Prose words/phrases as credible terms, descriptors and characterizations as part of a legitimate literary composition, thus signifying the infiltration of artificially modernized etymology and its manifestation as an extension of an elaborate ruse}.
{An innovative, percussive and aggressive method/style of writing wherein the author intentionally creates a word/phrase and a definition for the word/phrase as a weaponized literary instrument, objectively targeting and penetrating conventional thinking, culturally imposed dogmatic norms and multi-layered veils of psychosocially nurtured concepts. Ballistic Prose is a baiting tactic aimed in the direction of reckless, quasi-intellectual journalism with the supreme achievement occuring when journalists utilize such manufactured, Ballistic Prose words/phrases as credible terms, descriptors and characterizations as part of a legitimate literary composition, thus signifying the infiltration of artificially modernized etymology and its manifestation as an extension of an elaborate ruse}.
1. 'Seismic Aqueous Waveform S.A.W.' is an example of a ballistic prose characterization for a ridiculously large wave. There is no such thing as a S.A.W.
2. "Dude, NBC just referred to the most recent ocean wave surge as a 'Seismic Aqueous Waveform'. Do they have any clue that there is no such thing as a Seismic Aqueous Waveform? Lol!"
3. {Hambone reads and replies to one of D Dog's recent definitions on UD} "D Dog, your definitions are such a lively form of 'Ballistic Prose!" {D Dog replies} "Hambone, you just invented the term to describe this style off writing = Ballistic Prose."
2. "Dude, NBC just referred to the most recent ocean wave surge as a 'Seismic Aqueous Waveform'. Do they have any clue that there is no such thing as a Seismic Aqueous Waveform? Lol!"
3. {Hambone reads and replies to one of D Dog's recent definitions on UD} "D Dog, your definitions are such a lively form of 'Ballistic Prose!" {D Dog replies} "Hambone, you just invented the term to describe this style off writing = Ballistic Prose."
by Charitable Disguise January 3, 2020
Irreparable damage to human skin/cellular DNA caused during the era of radical climate change beginning in 1991.
{A progressive term used to characterize the harmful, mutative and disabling effects of global warming on human tissue, wherein hyper-radioactive, electro magnetic waves bombard, eviscerate, and, over extended periods of time, 'incinerate' layers of 'dermis' (skin). The presence of pathology is detectable when cellular membranes become necrotically cauterized, inducing an incurable, desmoplastic form of melanoma. The evidentiary revelation of the Dermal Incineration Event, or D.I.E., (beginning in 1991) was introduced by 'Al Gore Research Institute' scientists; Dr. Johnson Cooks, Professor Patty Meltingood and Dr. Kevin Michael Damone of Ridgemont.}
{A progressive term used to characterize the harmful, mutative and disabling effects of global warming on human tissue, wherein hyper-radioactive, electro magnetic waves bombard, eviscerate, and, over extended periods of time, 'incinerate' layers of 'dermis' (skin). The presence of pathology is detectable when cellular membranes become necrotically cauterized, inducing an incurable, desmoplastic form of melanoma. The evidentiary revelation of the Dermal Incineration Event, or D.I.E., (beginning in 1991) was introduced by 'Al Gore Research Institute' scientists; Dr. Johnson Cooks, Professor Patty Meltingood and Dr. Kevin Michael Damone of Ridgemont.}
1. Many of our neighbors were recently diagnosed with skin cancer as a consequence of the "Dermal Incineration Event."
2. Dr. Kevin Michael Damone gave two Earth Wind and Fire tickets to Charles Jefferson and his brother, then, 9 years later, published his introspective, proprietary, sealed thesis regarding the effects of the "Dermal Incineration Event (D.I.E.)" on the human condition after comparing conclusive data from three prominent subjects, Stacey, Linda and Mark Ratnor, while listening to side 1 of Led Zeppelin IV.
2. Dr. Kevin Michael Damone gave two Earth Wind and Fire tickets to Charles Jefferson and his brother, then, 9 years later, published his introspective, proprietary, sealed thesis regarding the effects of the "Dermal Incineration Event (D.I.E.)" on the human condition after comparing conclusive data from three prominent subjects, Stacey, Linda and Mark Ratnor, while listening to side 1 of Led Zeppelin IV.
by Charitable Disguise December 21, 2019
The original etymological root word for the modernized term = Politician.
The profession and practice of willingly engaging in relationships, behaviors, affairs and deceitful tactics for the purpose of self promotion/gain/sexual gratification through profiteering, theft, criminal enterprising and the cloaked instantiation of illicit/fraudulent activities without regard for harm, impairment and/or disability inflicted upon others.
{Background and Context}
Upon return from a research expedition in the aboriginal territory of Korkycow Australia, Dr. Chris Culvitude of Copenhagen delivered a lexicon postulate based on revelations from ancient scrolls and audio-phonic linguistic interpretations stemming from his interactions with the Hunterbiden Microcock Pygmalion Tribe. Dr. Culvitude was attempting to decode a scroll illustrating a smiling, garment rich man holding the heart of another person standing nearby, when a bitter feisty, belly scourged Pygmy pointed at the picture, clearly anunciating the word "Pirat-ician" with a heavy oriental accent. Dr. Culvitude phoned his partner Dr. Kevin Michael Damone of this revelation wherein it would serve as proof of Culvitudes conjecture on the transcontinental, English modernization and pronunciation of "Politician" which actually evolved from the Latin word "Pirata" combined with "ician", or "Piratician".
The profession and practice of willingly engaging in relationships, behaviors, affairs and deceitful tactics for the purpose of self promotion/gain/sexual gratification through profiteering, theft, criminal enterprising and the cloaked instantiation of illicit/fraudulent activities without regard for harm, impairment and/or disability inflicted upon others.
{Background and Context}
Upon return from a research expedition in the aboriginal territory of Korkycow Australia, Dr. Chris Culvitude of Copenhagen delivered a lexicon postulate based on revelations from ancient scrolls and audio-phonic linguistic interpretations stemming from his interactions with the Hunterbiden Microcock Pygmalion Tribe. Dr. Culvitude was attempting to decode a scroll illustrating a smiling, garment rich man holding the heart of another person standing nearby, when a bitter feisty, belly scourged Pygmy pointed at the picture, clearly anunciating the word "Pirat-ician" with a heavy oriental accent. Dr. Culvitude phoned his partner Dr. Kevin Michael Damone of this revelation wherein it would serve as proof of Culvitudes conjecture on the transcontinental, English modernization and pronunciation of "Politician" which actually evolved from the Latin word "Pirata" combined with "ician", or "Piratician".
"Dr. Damone, the Pygmy chief clearly said the word "Piratician" when trying to tell me about how a once friendly tribe deceived them, took their food reserves, fingered our Matriarchs and returned with an affect of innocence as if nary an expression of remorse."
by Charitable Disguise May 2, 2020
1. Originally adapted from the Armenian mis-pronunciation of the English word 'slice', 'Saliza' \s-uh-lies-uh\ is exclaimed with a sense of enthusiasm, urgency, frustration, confusion and disgust by a foreign order taker attempting to impersonate an authentic Italian pizzaiolo at any Rays Pizza restaurant in the United States. Sometimes articulated with deliberate extended emphasis on the consonant 'z' (i.e. Salizzzzza) as an indication of impatience when patrons are indecisive or quick to change their minds from their initial order.
2. A term used to ask a friend or a loved one if they want to hang out or grab a bite to eat. Often conveyed with intentional Armenian personified accent in a lower octave to incite the onset playful conversational/text banter.
2. A term used to ask a friend or a loved one if they want to hang out or grab a bite to eat. Often conveyed with intentional Armenian personified accent in a lower octave to incite the onset playful conversational/text banter.
1. {Patron walks up to counter at Rays Pizza to place an order} "I'd like a slice of pizza please." {Armenian impersonator replies} "What kind of 'Saliza'? {Patron responds} "Actually, two slices of cheese please." {Armenian impersonator, visibly frazzled with a vile and disconcerting affect, confirms and relays order} " You want a two 'Salizzzas? Hey, he want a two cheese 'Salizzzzzas.!" "Your numba 91(the same number given to every patron, is also the year the Armenia declared independence from the Soviet Union)
2. {Friend sends text to another friend} "Hey Days, you wanna "Saliza" on Saturday." {Friend replies} "Hey Days, would love to 'Salizzzzza!"
2. {Friend sends text to another friend} "Hey Days, you wanna "Saliza" on Saturday." {Friend replies} "Hey Days, would love to 'Salizzzzza!"
by Charitable Disguise October 26, 2019
Originally observed during an urgent, unplanned wardrobe transition from business attire to comfortable clothes at the onset of band practice, the term, 'Black Sock', evolved symbolically from a stereotypical garment donning of conformity (working for 'the man') to a statement of transformation, rebellion, commitment, fun, freedom and an unrelenting promulgation of ingenious collaboration with band mates. Sometimes chanted in the form of familiar choral revelries so as to induce and incite a frolic oriented 'BLACK SOCK' dance as an acknowledgement of symbiotic creativity among band mates.
Scenario Form and Description
Band member shows up to practice in business attire, quickly changes into shorts and a shirt, realizes he does not have extra socks, embarrassingly saunters into the arena with his guitar + comfortable clothes wearing his black business socks. Band mates, quick to observe and curtail said identity kerfuffle caused by the leftover business garments, initiate a chant:
"D Dog, Yes!!!
BLACK SOCK left,
BLACK SOCK right,
BLACK SOCK mutha fu**** gonna dance all night"
At the induced choral behest of his band mates, D Dog drops his instrument and proceeds to entertain his comrades with an accompanying Court Jester tempo oriented kick swap dance as a method of activating band member creativity.
Band member shows up to practice in business attire, quickly changes into shorts and a shirt, realizes he does not have extra socks, embarrassingly saunters into the arena with his guitar + comfortable clothes wearing his black business socks. Band mates, quick to observe and curtail said identity kerfuffle caused by the leftover business garments, initiate a chant:
"D Dog, Yes!!!
BLACK SOCK left,
BLACK SOCK right,
BLACK SOCK mutha fu**** gonna dance all night"
At the induced choral behest of his band mates, D Dog drops his instrument and proceeds to entertain his comrades with an accompanying Court Jester tempo oriented kick swap dance as a method of activating band member creativity.
by Charitable Disguise November 9, 2019
An uncommon, aberrant atmospheric condition wherein multiple opposing jet streams violently converge to form colossal, hydronautic vapor columns as a result of haphazardly fluctuating climatic temperatures, intense friction and a microcosmic, atomization of subterfuged kinetic energy. In especially unique and volatile environmental circumstances, extreme barometric density builds and induces a tourbillion-like vacuuming effect, whereby coagulating particles accumulate into a voluminous mass, temporarily opening a 'quantum' realm where cosmic physical properties emanate translucent, paralytic neuromuscular macro-waves.
1 {Curious Observer A} - "Dude, look at that incredible cloud formation over the Superstition mountains!" {Curious Observer B} - "Dude, thats a freaking 'Quantum Nimbus!'"
2. {Meteorologist broadcasting to audience} - "We've got some breaking, urgent news for you right now, so please listen closely, then take shelter immediatley if you are anywhere in the vicinity of the east valley. If you take a look at the weather map, right here, you will notice this unusual, columnar cloud structure, which, miraculously enough is the first observable evidence of a 'Quantum Nimbus' folks! Yes, you heard right, 'Quantum Nimbus'; capable of unleashing interminal cosmic destruction, peril, paralysis and the immediate extrication of human beings from the surface of the earth into an alternate quantum metaphysical realm, forever!"
2. {Meteorologist broadcasting to audience} - "We've got some breaking, urgent news for you right now, so please listen closely, then take shelter immediatley if you are anywhere in the vicinity of the east valley. If you take a look at the weather map, right here, you will notice this unusual, columnar cloud structure, which, miraculously enough is the first observable evidence of a 'Quantum Nimbus' folks! Yes, you heard right, 'Quantum Nimbus'; capable of unleashing interminal cosmic destruction, peril, paralysis and the immediate extrication of human beings from the surface of the earth into an alternate quantum metaphysical realm, forever!"
by Charitable Disguise December 6, 2019