Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

time out

A bogus, phoney baloney pseudo-punishment inflicted by soccer moms on their day care brats, after said day care brats have disobeyed for the 27th time.

The time out has a beginning, but never an end. Before the soccer mom releases the day care brat, the day care brat releases itself.

After little Chutney disobeyed her soccer mom for the 27th time, Michner gave her a time out.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005

oxymoron

Two words with disparate meanings, used together to form a nonsensical phrase.

Utah Jazz.

Military Intelligence.

Microsoft Code.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 26, 2005

Binderfender

An audible fart. An expulsion of waste gaseous hydrocarbons from the anus, accompanied by an audible roar or blatt, discernable by even the hearing impaired.

Miss Chalmers entertained the Ladies' Sewing Circle by blowing a raucous binderfender.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 18, 2005

Tobasco

A mild, tame, weak-flavored sauce used to add piquancy to food.

A tablespoon of Tobasco sauce will add some life to bacon, sausage, and potatoes.

by Cap'n Bullmoose May 6, 2005

sideshow

Lawless exhibition of speed practiced by Oakland coons.

I be goin to de sideshow.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005

john kerry

A limousine liberal pollutocrat who wanted to tax YOUR pants off to pay for socialist medicine and free abortions for all soccer moms.

A liberal twit who shoots geese to show he's really a good ol boy at heart. He wants to take away YOUR gun, but not the crips' guns.

A pantywaist who wants all prancing poofters to get married. Then maybe all the little doggies and kitties can get married too. And the horsey set people can marry their horses.

John Kerry is a mush wimp liberal who wants YOUR wallet.

by Cap'n Bullmoose August 18, 2006

sbd

A sea-borne dive bomber of World War II, the Douglas SBD Dauntless. The SBD was the Navy's main dive bomber in the first two years of the war. SBDs sank all four Japanese at the Battle of Midway in 1942. Pilots often called their plains "Slow but Deadly."

A silent but deadly fart. A foul-smelling tile peeler eased into play without a peep. This is the favorite fart of the prim and proper lady, and is useful at lady's clubs, in elevators, in streetcars, and in church.

Swede Vejtasa was an SBD Dauntless pilot in World War II. He shot down seven planes in one day in 1942.

Melissa let an SBD right next to the punch bowl at the church bazaar.

by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007