Skip to main content

Brucester's definitions

grout

Alt. name for a fart. An extremely accurate onomatopoeia for a very short ripping stuccatto type fart. So accurate it follows the word exactly. GR - The rasping start, OU - the classic change in tone. T - the abrupt end as the sphincter slams shut. GR OU T
Did you hear that? Someone grouted during prayers.
by Brucester September 10, 2006
mugGet the groutmug.

Gronk

British Trainspotter speak for a class 08
diesel electric shunting loco. The BTC commissioned about 1100 of them back in the late 50s and a substantial number are still in traffic.

Gronks are sometimes known as Jockos
1V57 failed just outside Reading and they had to use a Gronk to haul it in out of the way.
by Brucester February 24, 2009
mugGet the Gronkmug.

Spidge

"Treasure" brought up from shipwrecks on the seabed by scuba divers.

For "Treasure" read - mainly bits of brass rubbish. For "Brought up" read - furiuosly chiseled off against the clock. For "Scuba Divers" read - thieving pikeys.
For "Seabed" read - murkey depths of cold water with visibility of two metres.

For Spidge there is a heirachy of value, disregard all gold, jewells and other fantasy land nonsense the real wreck treasure chart goes something like this:-

1= Ships bell
2= Telegraph / telemotor
3= Compass binnacle
4= Helm
5= Steam whistle
6= Nice brass Nav or deck lights
7= Portholes
8= Crockery & cutlery etc

Consolation prizes for the lower ranks of the air diving one tank numpty:-

Rubber soles from dead seamans shoes, unidentified piece of brass, crockery fragment, lead shot, hooked up fishing weights, pieces of diving equipment dropped by other novices.

All of the quality items have to be reported to the Receiver Of Wreck who finds out if you are allowed to keep the stuff. The remaining detritus is used to decorate your fireplace until you get married when the wife "accidentally" puts it out for the dustman.
"Dived the Lanfrac last weekend"
"Hur hur, find any gold"
"Er, yes actually! a solid bar of it, unfortunately it was a Leigh Bishop trip so in fact it had been placed there and was lead cast and sprayed gold to look like one"
"Hur hur - Fools Spidge!"
by Brucester July 29, 2007
mugGet the Spidgemug.

golden hello

A term you may have previously used in business to describe a cash bonus on appointment, not in this instance though!..........

The sudden deluge of warm sweet smelling regurgitated SMA Gold infant formula that runs down your neck and shoulders during 'burping' - usually followed by a smile. It's what you get for being lazy and trying to get the whole bottle down without 'burping' mid way.
"Darling, has Jemima been fed" "Er-nope, not exactly she's
just had a golden hello"
by Brucester September 13, 2006
mugGet the golden hellomug.

clot mop

Man, the beach was utterly discusting, all sorts; used clot mops, skin willies and logs of shit
by Brucester September 16, 2006
mugGet the clot mopmug.

gregory

Cockney rhyming slang: Gregory Peck - neck. (Becoming out dated now though.)
Get that down yer Gregory
by Brucester September 10, 2006
mugGet the gregorymug.

cuntogenic

Someone who is perfectly aware that you are filming or taking a shot but justifies walking right in front of the camera. (Especially if you are shooting something important.)
I was videoing my daughter in a race at school sports day,
just as she reached the finish line some perfectly cuntogenic individual walked in front of me by less than a meter.
by Brucester June 14, 2007
mugGet the cuntogenicmug.

Share this definition