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the mental and metaphysical state of being utterly drunk; a complete outerbody drunkeness; if you dont know if you've been schlarky then you definitely havent been; if you take your girlfriend's shoe off her foot to fight someone over a fart when you've been drinking, then you're probably schlarky
"Dude, I was so schlarky last night I tried to place a phone call to the number 7 four times. Then I passed out at Miami Subs until they kicked me out."

"I think I was schlarky when I told that girl's boyfriend that I flicked his girl's butthole with my tongue. He punched me right in the face."

"I was schlarky when I did the Timex (when you wrap your peen around your forearm) at my parents' Christmas party. 'HEY EVERYONE, LOOK WHAT TIME IT IS!!!!'"

by Bobby Dong November 17, 2007
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