To not literally bum someone, but cater to their every need. For example, you always talk about that person, you always say how attractive you find them, you make them cakes and stuff. and (not literally) you bum lick them.
Emily: "OMGG i love ben he is so cute, isn't he so cute! i love him! I'm gonna make him a cake on his birthday"
Beth: (rolls eyes) "cool can i help?"
Emily: "NO WAY, i don't want you getting any of the credit cos i love him"
Beth: "OH **** you! just cos your professionally bumming him"
EMily runs off and crys.
Beth: (rolls eyes) "cool can i help?"
Emily: "NO WAY, i don't want you getting any of the credit cos i love him"
Beth: "OH **** you! just cos your professionally bumming him"
EMily runs off and crys.
by Betty Weiner September 27, 2007
A fucking loser who tries to pretend like He/She is very intelligent, formal, high class, and superior to everyone else and calls them "Lessers" meanwhile in reality He/She is a fucking pathetic loser who was most likely bullied at school and have no rizz, no bitches, and have prolly never have gone outside before. He/She just sits there all day whining on social media and tries to act like He/She is superior to everyone else and silences anyone who opposes His/Her beliefs because the degenerate can't comprehend someone else thinking differently as Him/Her so He/She just resorts to cancelling someone because He/She deep down knows that the other person is right and they're just a complete idiot for thinking they are far superior to everyone else for having the "right" opinions so He/She uses cancel culture as a coping mechanism for Him/Her outrageous and downright stupid beliefs.
The Bum: "I LOVE COMMUNISM, TIKTOK, FEMINISM, BLM, BUZZFEED, AND THE LEFT WING! ANYONE WHO DISAGREES IS A RACIST HOMOPHOBIC FATPHOBIC TRUMP SUPPORTING SEXIST INCEL MISOGYNISTIC WHORE AND YOU NEED TO BE CANCELLED AND FUCK YOU!"
Any normal person: "Damn bro, you're a Professional Bum."
The Bum: "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY YOU LITTLE BITCH ASS NIGGA HOW DARE YOU OPPOSE ME YOUR SORRY ASS NEEDS TO BE CANCELLED RIGHT NOW!"
Any normal person: 🤓 <-- This you?
Any normal person: "Damn bro, you're a Professional Bum."
The Bum: "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY YOU LITTLE BITCH ASS NIGGA HOW DARE YOU OPPOSE ME YOUR SORRY ASS NEEDS TO BE CANCELLED RIGHT NOW!"
Any normal person: 🤓 <-- This you?
by Captain Pingu September 14, 2022
When a person with a full-time professional career (i.e. doctor, engineer, lawyer) spends all their extra money and free time on high end ski gear and ski trips. Professional ski bums live for winter and will spend any amount of money and PTO to indulge their powder hound desires. Within reason. Professional ski bums are differentiated from regular ski bums by their desires to also own a home, have a girlfriend, a nice car, a career, a retirement plan, and to smell nice.
Professional Ski Bum 1: I have saved up 20 days of PTO! We should take a killer trip to Chamonix this season!
Professional Ski Bum 2: I just bought a pair of skis during the DPS Dreamtime that would make shredding Chamonix sick!
Co-worker: So what are you doing this weekend?
Professional Ski Bum: I'm going skiing.
Co-worker: Skiing? But it's the middle of August!? It hasn't snowed for months, and it won't snow for a few weeks more!
Professional Ski Bum: Uhh, it's winter in Patagonia, and Bariloche is supposed to get close to 2 feet! FYI, I won't be in the office on Monday. Or Tuesday. And possibly Wednesday.
Professional Ski Bum 2: I just bought a pair of skis during the DPS Dreamtime that would make shredding Chamonix sick!
Co-worker: So what are you doing this weekend?
Professional Ski Bum: I'm going skiing.
Co-worker: Skiing? But it's the middle of August!? It hasn't snowed for months, and it won't snow for a few weeks more!
Professional Ski Bum: Uhh, it's winter in Patagonia, and Bariloche is supposed to get close to 2 feet! FYI, I won't be in the office on Monday. Or Tuesday. And possibly Wednesday.
by Helluva Engineer September 11, 2019
A person who is overqualified to be just a literal bum, they are exceptionally skilled in the art of their trade.
Their lively-hood consist of a very strategic master manipulation ploy to go above and beyond all acts of the call of duty BUMISM!
To be considered a professional ass bum you must NEVER be able to keep a job past a 2-4 week time period. Always, find a way to not keep a job...EXCUSES!
You must always appear to look like you are indeed not a bum.
You must be an expert in doing ABSOLUTELY nothing, yet appear to be EVERYTHING.
To become a master in Professional Ass Bumism... you sabotage everything around you that does NOT benefit you.
Only a Professional Ass Bum has the ability to make a career out of this lifestyle.
Their lively-hood consist of a very strategic master manipulation ploy to go above and beyond all acts of the call of duty BUMISM!
To be considered a professional ass bum you must NEVER be able to keep a job past a 2-4 week time period. Always, find a way to not keep a job...EXCUSES!
You must always appear to look like you are indeed not a bum.
You must be an expert in doing ABSOLUTELY nothing, yet appear to be EVERYTHING.
To become a master in Professional Ass Bumism... you sabotage everything around you that does NOT benefit you.
Only a Professional Ass Bum has the ability to make a career out of this lifestyle.
by ThaRealZaddddy12 November 8, 2019