Someone who under the influence of Xanax will steal anything and everything they can get their hands on including items that already belong to them.
Normally Bob is completely trustworthy unless he's had a Xanax then he becomes a kleptoxaniac I will try to steal anything not nailed down and some things that are!
by Dr. Muhu A. Haha July 1, 2022
Get the kleptoxaniac mug.I cannot help myselfdownloading. I am compulsively downloading all sorts of files from the internt and leeching like theres no tomorrow. I grab what I can when I can almost as if a kid in a candy shop stealing all the sweets . I am a Cyber kleptomaniac a leech, help me.
by Firmstone June 21, 2008
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Link suffers from kleptomania, i mean he wanders into peoples houses and robs them blind, and they don t stop him.
by cpt. turtle June 12, 2005
Get the kleptomania mug.A Kleptomaniac is a person who is afflicted with Kleptomania, a compulsion to repeatedly steal "worthless" items, such as keychains and small fruit.
It is unclear whether it is due to depression, or people who are seeking more control of their life, but there are very few cases where diagnosed kleptomaniacs have stolen expensive items along the lines of jewelry and automobiles.
It is unclear whether it is due to depression, or people who are seeking more control of their life, but there are very few cases where diagnosed kleptomaniacs have stolen expensive items along the lines of jewelry and automobiles.
Winona Ryder was caught shoplifting several times at a grocery store, and is believed to be a kleptomaniac.
by David Salberg April 27, 2006
Get the kleptomaniac mug.Waking up hungover after a heavy night of drinking, often including blackouts and puking the superb act of being trashed - awakening to find a bunch of items that you don't actually own, on your drawers.
These are drunk trophies, memorabilia from the night before. Unfortunately as you pick them up the memories often don't come back, why do I have this mascara set on my desk? Whose keys are these? Why is this screw driver here?
If you've asked any of these questions you have been a victim (or more so abuser) of Drunken Kleptomania. Simply put, drunken kleptomania is a state in which you steal shit and bring it back, but you were drunk, so drunk in fact that you don't remember how you procured said shit.
FACT: 67% of men have participated in drunken kleptomania.
These are drunk trophies, memorabilia from the night before. Unfortunately as you pick them up the memories often don't come back, why do I have this mascara set on my desk? Whose keys are these? Why is this screw driver here?
If you've asked any of these questions you have been a victim (or more so abuser) of Drunken Kleptomania. Simply put, drunken kleptomania is a state in which you steal shit and bring it back, but you were drunk, so drunk in fact that you don't remember how you procured said shit.
FACT: 67% of men have participated in drunken kleptomania.
John woke up, it was Sunday - Bloody Sunday he thought as his head felt like someone was putting it in a vice set like in Casino, only this was a four-way pressure clusterfuck squeezing the scrambled mess of hungover brains. His eyes burned as he let out a mighty grunt. Suddenly his eyes opened a bit wider, the pain subsiding as a subtle "What the fuck" blurted out.
There he clumsily stood, gawking at what was his room. He noticed the new construction sign that was broken through the dry wall. The lipstick that was on the bureau and the amassed set of keys. He examined the keys and lipstick with peculiar intrigue...
"Wha, When the fuck did I get this?"
The memories from last night were not coming back, He remembered leaving the party, and the beer bong an hour before that, but nothing in between or after. Just then his roommate came into the room.
"Dude, you were so fucked last night..."
Little did John know, but he had participated in the greatest robbery, the largest collection of Drunken Kleptomania since 1974.
There he clumsily stood, gawking at what was his room. He noticed the new construction sign that was broken through the dry wall. The lipstick that was on the bureau and the amassed set of keys. He examined the keys and lipstick with peculiar intrigue...
"Wha, When the fuck did I get this?"
The memories from last night were not coming back, He remembered leaving the party, and the beer bong an hour before that, but nothing in between or after. Just then his roommate came into the room.
"Dude, you were so fucked last night..."
Little did John know, but he had participated in the greatest robbery, the largest collection of Drunken Kleptomania since 1974.
by Jimblor April 7, 2009
Get the Drunken Kleptomania mug.by Raj-Verma October 22, 2019
Get the Kleptomania mug.Someone who, when they find an offense that isn't nailed down, will take it, even if they have no connection at all to the person or group that would supposedly be offended by the "offense" in question. This malady is often found in those practicing political correctness, though not exclusive to them.
"What's he complaining about? He's not even affected, it has nothing to do with him whatsoever."
"Oh, he's an offense kleptomaniac."
"Oh, he's an offense kleptomaniac."
by nohbody January 1, 2009
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