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Constipated
Me: Doctor! I think i'm constipated.
Doctor: What did you eat?
Me: Really nothing but i did shove flex tape up my ass.
Morgan Freeman: And the moral here is.. Don't shove flex tape up your ass
Doctor: What did you eat?
Me: Really nothing but i did shove flex tape up my ass.
Morgan Freeman: And the moral here is.. Don't shove flex tape up your ass
Constipated by qwertyhujkjhgfdfgbnmhbg October 30, 2018
Related Words
costimate • constimate • constimated • costimation • constipated • castigate • constipate • Constipater • Castipated • chestimate
Constipated
Constipated by Mystic_Snowfang June 25, 2009
Curly Haired Constipated Fuck
Curly Haired Constipated Fuck is one of the tributes from The Hunger Games. He is played by Ethan Jamieson, and his "nickname" arose from the tumblr blog "badlydrawnhungergames" who fell in love with him and named him Curly Haired Constipated Fuck.
Curly Haired Constipated Fuck by TRIBUTE June 18, 2012
Constipated Mouse
The 'Constipated Mouse' is a sound effect achieved by yelling a long 'aahh!', in a more high-pitched voice from the top of your throat; a baby-voice or childish voice while making the Constipated Mouse noise is also required. It is also possible to speak in this mouse voice. When you are making this effect, just imagine a simple mouse trying to force a bowel movement out on his tiny, porcelain toilet.
This sound is very useful in intense situations, such as a murderer entering your house.
This sound is very useful in intense situations, such as a murderer entering your house.
*Murderer breaks lock open on front door*.
Resident: "Aahh!" *In the Constipated Mouse voice*.
Murderer: "What the hell is that?"
Resident: "It's our constipated mouse, you better get the f*ck outta here before he takes a poop all over your God damn face... uh-oh, here he comes!"
"Aahh!"
Chris: "Aah!" *In the Constipated Mouse voice*.
Nick: "Haha! That sounds like a constipated mouse!"
Chris: "God damn it," *In the Constipated Mouse voice*.
Resident: "Aahh!" *In the Constipated Mouse voice*.
Murderer: "What the hell is that?"
Resident: "It's our constipated mouse, you better get the f*ck outta here before he takes a poop all over your God damn face... uh-oh, here he comes!"
"Aahh!"
Chris: "Aah!" *In the Constipated Mouse voice*.
Nick: "Haha! That sounds like a constipated mouse!"
Chris: "God damn it," *In the Constipated Mouse voice*.
Constipated Mouse by The Oddly Moustached Cat August 2, 2010
Constipated
Suppose you haven't taken a shit for a while and every time you go to the bathroom your poop does not budge because it is firmly stuck and rock hard. You strain yourself but still you cannot get the turd out and you tear your butt hole while you are crying and trying to push it out. This feeling of extreme pain and not being able to pass shit is constipation and one calls you "constipated".
Tom who was not being able to take a crap because the poop was extremely hard ,felt relieved after the doctor explained to him that he was constipated and recommended a suppository.
Constipated by Hp October 17, 2012
intellectually constipated
Someone who is mentally incapable of thinking for himself. Someone who has shit for brains but can't even use the shit.
intellectually constipated by Anton Doos May 3, 2016
More from Urban Dictionary
Frothability
The measure of an emotional and over zealous consumer in an upwardly charging market, also known as a bull market. It's characterized by rising asset prices, increased investor confidence, and favorable growth in the markets, bro.
The frothability was evident as over-zealous consumers eagerly engaged in bidding wars, driving property prices to unsustainable levels reminiscent of previous speculative bubbles.
Frothability by cptn.kagaroo1 January 26, 2024
Word of the Day on November 12, 2026
Soul digger
A man who dates women with the sole purpose of exploiting their time, energy, and labor while he sucks the joy and happiness from their lives.
"That guy's a soul digger. He'll expect you to work full time, but you'll be doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, and childcare while he plays video games or watches TV."
Soul digger by anonymous November 11, 2026
Word of the Day on November 11, 2026
pod person
A person pretending to be something they aren't, or an impostor. This is inferred because of the old alien movies where alien pods appear on earth and the "pod people" dispose of the humans and slowly reproduce the bodies, pretending to be humans.
The pod person was pretending to be my father, but I knew that he was an alien when he acted differently than my father ever would have.
pod person by Christopher M. May 9, 2005
Word of the Day on November 10, 2026
dead drop
A dead drop is a location used to secretly pass items between two people, without requiring them to meet.
Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.
A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.
A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.
A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.
A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
"The dead drop is the restroom toilet at the Gulf station at the corner of Commercial Ave. and Georges Rd."
dead drop by rubberroom July 23, 2008
Word of the Day on November 9, 2026
No Surprises Wedding
A "No Surprises Wedding," or NSW, is a wedding invitation designation that tells attendees that there can be no unplanned announcements, engagements, events or speeches at the wedding - all actions must be pre-approved by the couple. Anyone who performs an unapproved "surprise" will be asked to leave the wedding early.
This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
You are cordially invited to the nuptials of Brian and Tom on October 31 at noon.
Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
No Surprises Wedding by dbdefenestrate August 27, 2023
Word of the Day on November 8, 2026
ulzzang
Ulzzang true definition is "best & "face" = best face in korean. They are basically people with above average looks, sometimes with the use of photoshop and haduri who post their pics online, some becoming internet celebrities.
ulzzang by `r i k kit t y February 26, 2008
Word of the Day on November 7, 2026