Jesus, I was talking to Austin and apparently Keith Cockfiscated the right to dismantle his ass. I asked Austin how he felt, and he said it was no big deal, Keith hadn’t canscaped for a while and he was getting disgusted seeing his hairy ass ass!
After a man shaves his never-regions and leaves prickly stubble, his cock and balls temporarily resembles a skin coloured cactus, thus becoming a cocktus.
Hey Jenny, how did it go with Iain last night, did he give you a night to remember?
He sure did! I think he shaved his pubes a few days ago because it felt like he shoved a cactus up my vag! It’s was so fucking prickly, and now it’s sooo itchy down there...
Ohh dammmn Jenny! Iain stuck you with his cocktus, we all been there! Get some Sudocrem on that shit!
Last night that bitch I was with almost knocked herself out cold when she had her head too close to my balls as Cocktimus Prime was transforming. Dumb bitch, so I used Cocktimus Prime's main weapon, the baseball bat swing, and knocked her skank ass out anyway. All hail Cocktimus Prime.
The photo of a man's cock, typically taken by a cell phone, that makes it appear larger than what it really is because there is nothing else in the photo as a frame of reference to indicate it's true size. This is typically a close up zoom of the actual member.
Girl 1: OMG! Your boyfriend's cock is huge!
Girl 2: No, that photo he texted me is just a cocktical illusion. If his hand were in the photo then you'd see that his jimmy is just normal size.