"So I kick open the door to the locker room and Fred's bent over in front of his locker, and I'm seeing his starfish and clock weights. My retinas are burning."
When performing the 69 with the guy on top as he lowers himself down his scrotum rests on the bridge of his birds nose and a bollock falls into either eye socket,
Fat bird that you wanna eat but dont know or dont wanna try taking the wait of this big fattie on ya chest,
so you give her the dutch clock weights in the eyes,
as seen on a grandfather clock the winding weights on the chain that hangs down,
The southerly appendages of the male reproductive system, contained within the nad bag, and known to swing back and forth, not unlike the clock weights in a grandfather clock.
Eric to Harold in the 1981 Brokeback classic, Chariots Of Fire: "I do so hope this running ends soon Harold old chap. My gentleman's clock weights are chaffed redder than a baboons arse!"
Ruler of Lake Titicaca. Rumored to have a bunghole that gets very angry if it does not receive toilet paper. Cornholio the Great is often seen walking around with his shirt over his head and his hands in the air, chanting songs about his power, and his bunghole.
"I am Cornholio! You do not want to face the wrath of my bunghole, for I need TP!"
Butthead: Shut up, Beavis! (uh huh huh huh)
Beavis: Um, okay. (heh heh heh heh).