brainwanking 

Any intellectual/academic discussion meant more to show off the intelligence of the speaker than to prove a point or educate anyone listening.

Freudian literary criticism is pretty useless, to be honest; eventually they stop talking about literature entirely, in favor of pointless brainwanking.

brainwanking by kiefda03 June 10, 2010

Brainwaving 

Thinking. The main symptom of a working mind.

How are you Daniel?
Brainwaving.
Boss?
Braindead.

Brainwaving by rperazag May 23, 2010

Brainjacking 

The act of achieving orgasm and/or genital secretion via ones thought process with no physical aide whatsoever.

"I had this raging hard on last night and all I could think about was Tyler Perry dressed up as Madea. Unfortunately I was too drunk to masturbate before I fell asleep. Shortly thereafter I was fairly certain I woke up pissing my pants. Once I came to, thankfully, I had realized I was only brainjacking." - Michael Richards

Albert: (sees Mikey making a face) Is he taking a dump?
Mollie: No, he's thinking real hard! - Look Who's Talking (1989)

Brainjacking by Mr. Douchébag November 27, 2009

beta male brainwashing 

n.

Indoctrinating a susceptible male to crave an inferior sexual role through pornographic audio, video, images, and literature. The first step is convincing him that he is beta (β) while most of his peers are Alpha (α). Then, by justifying and fetishizing the "Alpha fucks beta bucks" axiom, he is persuaded to understand and embrace his beta status.

α β Dogma

1. αbove, βelow
Proper pecking order in human society & natural selection

2. αhead, βehind
In board room or bedroom, confident α dominates, insecure β submits

4. α stud, β dud
If comparing body, face, penis size, sexual skill / stamina, etc, α winner, β loser

5. α pussy magnet, β pussy repellent
- α pheromones make pussy wet to aid in penetration & insemination
- β pheromones are pussy desiccants that impede penetration & thicken cervical mucus

6. α gets the thrill, β foots the bill
- α gives nothing & gets pleased
- β gives everything & gets teased

7. α sticks it, β licks it
- α goal to get his dick wet
- β goal to give unreciprocated oral sex

8. α breeds, β feeds
In reproduction, males seek quantity, females seek quality. Wise women find a witting (or unwitting) beta male provider before or after procreating with an Alpha.

9. α pokes, β strokes
Never any reason for α to masturbate or β to penetrate

10. α gets sucked, β gets cucked
- women love giving blowjobs if male is α not β
- α receives oral, β watches or gives

It's called brainwashing because the above statements are controversial.

After years of watching, hearing, and reading beta male brainwashing, I'm only attracted to a woman if she's the type that will happily use me for my time and money but never have sex with me.

beta male brainwashing by NeverGonnaGetIt69 July 19, 2021

baby brainwashing 

The act of repeatedly whispering a word or series of words into a the ears of a small child preferably between the ages of 1 and 1 and a half. One can tell it is working when the child has a blank stare on his face - his eyes are peering off into the distance not really focused on any particular thing and his mouth is open slightly as if he is about to drool. Particularly useful if one seeks to one-day rule the world.

Can be performed on both males and females, though females tend to be more susceptible to the brainwashing.

Hey Manny why does Isabella have that blank stare on her face, and why is her mouth open slightly as if she's about to drool? Oh wait... dude Rafael is brainwashing your baby!

I will implement the technique of baby brainwashing to one day rule the world!

baby brainwashing by Leafarzarian June 25, 2009

self-brainwashing 

Extricating certain words, thoughts, beliefs, and expectations from one's brain and replacing them with other words, thoughts, beliefs, and/or expectations by writing them, reading them, recording them, playing them back, thinking about them and practicing them.

Reading numerous self-help books I realized that my beliefs and expectations were injected into me in various ways by different people since I was a child. Gradually, I realized that I could replace the negative words, thoughts, beliefs, and expectations with correct and better ones. I call that process self-brainwashing.

self-brainwashing by but for May 7, 2018

brainwashing

The purpose of churches

Let's take our son to church so he can be programmed with the same mythological bullshit we were programmed with! This will protect him from brainwashing by the schools with their "facts".

brainwashing by Olorin42 February 18, 2009