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birkenshlock

Imitation alternative-health merchandise, pseudo-spiritual chochkas, and cheap novelty accessories offered at most open-air fairs and by two-bit street vendors in college towns.

It's a take-off on the classic Birkenstock shoes. The original Birkenstocks are high-quality foot-wear worth anyone's money. The fakes for $20 fall to bits in two weeks' time. By extension, any street fair has stalls of well-made goods created chiefly by local craftsmen and craftswomen, and then also those stalls offering vastly inferior import trinkets and poser products fronting to be the real deal.
"This fair used to be good, but now there are mostly fly-by-nighters trying to palm off greasy pizza and birkenshlock."
by focus5 June 22, 2009
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Birkenstocker

A creepy hippy that stalks people.
A: Did you pick up your vitamins at the health food store?
B: I tried but there was a 'Birkenstocker' following me down every aisle and I had to ditch him.
by Bryan Gilbreath October 17, 2010
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Birkenstocks on the ground

The presence of the popular sandal at an event or gathering. The preferred footwear for hippies, lesbians, old people and preppies.
"There were plenty of Birkenstocks on the ground at the Berkeley alumni reunion."
by yes juanito yes October 12, 2014
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Birkenstocks

Sandals worn by liberals, women in Vermont, and for some unknown reason, evangelical youth pastors trying to appeal to young adherents of Christianity.
Pastor Mike has a goatee and wears Birkenstocks--he looks like a pothead for Jesus when in reality his only addictions are online porn and energy drinks.
by Gary Vitalis February 24, 2007
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birkenflock

a group or gathering of three or more lesbians. The term is a portmanteau of the words "birkenstock" and "flock." Birkenstock refers to the footwear commonly worn by dykes & lesbians.
When we were at Home Depot, there was a huge birkenflock of dykes standing out front near their pickup trucks.
by AMtwo November 5, 2010
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birkenshocked

Adjective. Appalled, horrified, outraged, shocked, revolted, disgusted.
"Oh my god, did you hear that Florence isn't 100% GMO free?????" "No way, I am simply birkenshocked."
by roguebonerz December 8, 2016
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birkenstocks

The gym teacher wore birkenstocks to the sleepover.
by T-Dog Jenkins January 23, 2005
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