In mathematics, an asymptote is a
line that continually approaches a given curve but does not meet it at any finite distance. In other words, though it curves towards zero, it approaches it indefinitely and never actually reaches it.
Asymptoting describes the phenomenon in which despite the regular passage of time, your relative perception of time appears to slow as you get closer to an event, date, time, etc. Because the
line never reaches zero, but travels towards it for
infinity, you too feel as if you will infinitely travel towards something that you will never reach. Much
like the phenomenon of running towards a door in a dream, but never quite reaching it
even though you are covering ground.
Rocko couldn't believe his luck! He had just won an all-expenses paid trip to visit
Paris, where he could finally meet the
girl of his dreams, Claudette! The only problem was that the trip was a whole month away! Poor Rocko. He was so excited to go, that
one month felt
like six. Time dragged on. Rocko was asymptoting. HARD.
"Why is this year asymptoting?!" Filburt lamented. "I can't wait for it to be over! Oh fishsticks!"
Heffer hated weekly team meetings at the Chokey
Chicken. "I'
m getting hungry!" Heffer thought to himself. "Surely thirty minutes must have passed." He looked at the
clock. To his dismay, only six minutes had gone by. Heffer heard his stomach growl. "Even my stomach is asymptoting!" he thought.
Ed Bighead dutifully went to work every day, dreaming of a day in which he could finally get "the big office." In his younger days, Ed felt a sense of accomplishment with his work at Conglom-O. But now that Ed was
pushing 55, he instead felt himself asymptoting; working endlessly towards a goal he would never meet.
.
