A term used to describe how much of a dick, prick, asshole with the insides that when released could clear out a whole work space. Usually the person accused of acting like an alward can constructively and verbally tear a person down to the point of total loss of self worth, resulting in the person targeted by the alward to drive themselves into total confusion, second guessing themselves, and even sometimes crying themselves to sleep.
Alward:
Gaston....GASTON! I will give you some good news Tina. Now that you took your head out of your ass and decided to see the light guess who found out the solution to the problem we have been having since you and the old man touched the computer. That's right Me...I mean my god molly sue I don't know where you were when they where handing out common sense. Maybe you where standing in the mirror trying to find out what thong made your ass just look sexy or maybe your where riding down the street thinking of your favorite boy band that gets your heart to flutter every your hear there voice, but one thing is certain you ended up at the dumb ass store and put as much of that as you can in a cart and called it a day.
Gaston:
You know what your acting like a total Alward.
Gaston....GASTON! I will give you some good news Tina. Now that you took your head out of your ass and decided to see the light guess who found out the solution to the problem we have been having since you and the old man touched the computer. That's right Me...I mean my god molly sue I don't know where you were when they where handing out common sense. Maybe you where standing in the mirror trying to find out what thong made your ass just look sexy or maybe your where riding down the street thinking of your favorite boy band that gets your heart to flutter every your hear there voice, but one thing is certain you ended up at the dumb ass store and put as much of that as you can in a cart and called it a day.
Gaston:
You know what your acting like a total Alward.
by Timmy long lance December 3, 2007
Get the alward mug.A person whom contradicts themselves by telling someone to be professional, when in actual fact, they themselves are an unprofessional tosser.
by Defender89 April 7, 2025
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alward
• akward
• alearda
• Allard
• akward turtle
• Allardice
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• akwardo
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Joe Smo - Dude I just screwed Nikki in the ass..it was awesome. Joe Smo's Buddy- Dude you got the brown star award..thats Epic.
by 1 with Nature February 12, 2015
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Nominated for 2014 Granny Awards Rock Album of the Year:
Zeppelin, Sabbath, Bowie and Neil Young
-- Four acts that were "too hip to be square"* around 1970.
Kings of Leon and Queens of the Stone Age
-- Named after a passe form of government and a truly ancient Age of Tech.
How desperately we cling to illusions of youth and relevancy. -- Citizen of the Galaxy
* Once upon a time, even Before the Flood, contemporaneous fans of "Old Blue Eyes" and the "Candy Man" embarrassed themselves with such phrases, in a vain attempt to sustain their own relevance. Please, STOP THE MADNESS!
Zeppelin, Sabbath, Bowie and Neil Young
-- Four acts that were "too hip to be square"* around 1970.
Kings of Leon and Queens of the Stone Age
-- Named after a passe form of government and a truly ancient Age of Tech.
How desperately we cling to illusions of youth and relevancy. -- Citizen of the Galaxy
* Once upon a time, even Before the Flood, contemporaneous fans of "Old Blue Eyes" and the "Candy Man" embarrassed themselves with such phrases, in a vain attempt to sustain their own relevance. Please, STOP THE MADNESS!
by Citizen of the Galaxy February 23, 2014
Get the Granny Awards mug.Another term for "award" that originated from a typo the Monke brained Connor of Trash Taste while typing the Reddit post for their podcast's anniversary.
by Rain-nin May 28, 2021
Get the awardw mug.Very great person has a very high temper goes to war about her loved ones and never switches up
Loyal at all times even when you piss them off
Loyal at all times even when you piss them off
Alwande is a great person
by Goof_yqueen March 21, 2021
Get the Alwande mug.An award for individuals who vocally opposed masks and vaccinations in response to COVID-19, and then either ended up in the hospital or died.
Person A: "Did you hear about Doug? He died of COVID last week. His family watched it happen on an iPad. So sad."
Person B: "Wasn't he bragging two weeks ago about injecting horse de-wormer up his asshole when he got diagnosed? That guy was a real Herman Cain Award winner right there."
Person B: "Wasn't he bragging two weeks ago about injecting horse de-wormer up his asshole when he got diagnosed? That guy was a real Herman Cain Award winner right there."
by Y2k September 2, 2021
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