Trackup
A push up invented by Amos Halftrack. Done not unlike a normal push up except with the aid of martini glasses which you push up off of. He often does them after a night of partying when he has been stone cold drunk. He also involves his wife, Martha Kate Rogers Halftrack.
Marty: Boy, these Trackups are hard! I don't know how you manage to do these.
Papa Amos: Well, they may be hard, but they work wonders on your arms. Feel this!! (he flexes his bicep and Marty crunches it)
Marty: Boy, that's one tough arm, there!
Papa Amos: That's from years of doing Trackups! Now, its not just any old push up. You've really gotta be in shape to do these babies. (takes a couple of martini glasses and does a trackup off of them to show her what he means)
Marty: Wow!! That's 78-year old bicep there!
Papa Amos: (bends down) Ten HUT! You aren't kidding there Little Missy! You may be my wife, but I'm gonna show you how we brigadier generals work out. (singing to the General Car Insurance theme) You want hard biceps all the time? Try doing Trackups, they're real fine!
Stainy: (comes running in with a Bloody Mary) Mind if I join you? I want to learn these too! (he quickly drinks his drink and sets the glass down on the floor)
Papa Amos: Well, here I'll show you how to do it. Give me that glass for a second. (he gets down on the floor and does another Trackup, which Stainy follows) See, its easy. All you do is push up off the martini glass. You can't do it close-handed or they'll break.
Stainy: Looks easy enough! Would they work on a 92-year old red fox like me?
Papa Amos: (starts laughing and jumping) Yeah, they sure would! You've already got the knack of how to do them. Hey, drop down and knock out 10 more for me. (blowing his whistle) Ten HUT!
Papa Amos: Well, they may be hard, but they work wonders on your arms. Feel this!! (he flexes his bicep and Marty crunches it)
Marty: Boy, that's one tough arm, there!
Papa Amos: That's from years of doing Trackups! Now, its not just any old push up. You've really gotta be in shape to do these babies. (takes a couple of martini glasses and does a trackup off of them to show her what he means)
Marty: Wow!! That's 78-year old bicep there!
Papa Amos: (bends down) Ten HUT! You aren't kidding there Little Missy! You may be my wife, but I'm gonna show you how we brigadier generals work out. (singing to the General Car Insurance theme) You want hard biceps all the time? Try doing Trackups, they're real fine!
Stainy: (comes running in with a Bloody Mary) Mind if I join you? I want to learn these too! (he quickly drinks his drink and sets the glass down on the floor)
Papa Amos: Well, here I'll show you how to do it. Give me that glass for a second. (he gets down on the floor and does another Trackup, which Stainy follows) See, its easy. All you do is push up off the martini glass. You can't do it close-handed or they'll break.
Stainy: Looks easy enough! Would they work on a 92-year old red fox like me?
Papa Amos: (starts laughing and jumping) Yeah, they sure would! You've already got the knack of how to do them. Hey, drop down and knock out 10 more for me. (blowing his whistle) Ten HUT!
Trackup by Dusty's Baby Powder May 21, 2011
