Although it may start out as an infinitesimal itch, testicular readjustment, or desire to reaffirm and reassure yourself that you're still intact, we, the male species, are guilty of indulging in a little sacofricosis from time to time. When my uncle was busted by my aunt for this, he attempted to save face by saying that he was digging for change.

phone: why don’t you go to sleep tommy it’s 2 in the morning?
tommy:why don’t you die you dumbazz